In honor of our
Our random number generator selected number 42, a comment belonging to Elderberry Hamster — (which, although not caption-contest-winner-worthy, was still a respectable level of funny).
Elderberry Hamster says: The only photo evidence from the Flock of Seagals first and only concert.
Meanwhile, here’s your winner of the caption contest:
Nowacki says: Turns out his unique physiological reaction IS RIPPIN’ TASTY F*CKIN’ LICKS!
(*Applause sounds*) Congratulations, Nowacki. Enjoy your $150 gift card, and maybe buy some Seagal energy drink to show respect.
And here are some of your runners up:
Johnny Awesome says: “Hey, female. I call these sweet guitar licks, ‘Taking You To El Banco De La Sangre.’ I taught it to Jimmy Hendrix.”
My Newt says: “You stepping in on me, squaw?”
Don Turtuccio says: “Must… not… ejaculate… guitar… solo.”
monkeyhaiku says: I can’t see what chord he’s playing, but I just bet it’s something jazzy. A minor 7 flat 5 or something.
hansstronger says: Steven Seagal only uses his hands for sandwiches and solos. Everything else, front kicks.
Dingus says: Our sound is kind of a mix of people playing guitars, and Wayne Newton’s haircut.
LanceUppercut says: Seagal apparently has a unique musical reaction to arousal.
Mannytaur says: F*ckin Seagal, man. That creep can wail.
ScreenDoorOnYourSubmarine says: Hypnotized by his steely gaze and wicked solo skills, only one man could save her. *the sound of a saxophone solo echoes from a distance. Greasy sax man approacheth.
Swader says: “I invented the front lick, baby.”
GutsAndTalent says: “How about we go back to my place, snort some powdered deer penis, use your corset to hold in my neck fat, play David Carradine love connection, and think of some vaguely interchangeable three word movie titles?
Oski says: Angered by the death of Lo Pan, Seagal began to inflate before eventually exploding.
The Evil Twin says: Seagal just impregnated her with a power chord (something which, btw, he invented).
So thanks for playing, everyone. I hope I did all right with the choices. I read so many Steven Seagal jokes that I lost track of space, time, and the ability to judge funny.