James Franco’s ass recently appeared on the cover of Flaunt magazine (which I’m sure you all read, underline, and own every copy of), and while I’ve no doubt it was celebrity profile most fascinating, I covered this story mostly so I could write that headline. It’s the headline I was born to write. I’m sure you understand. And if  you just want to skip the blockquote, I’ve got some more ass-related stuff after the jump that I highly recommend.

Flaunt: Those who have critiqued your work in the last couple years seem to express a lot of confusion at what’s going on—surely, much of which is to do with your voluminous and commendable output. Still, are you seeking to confuse? Is this part of your artistic intent? If so, why?
Franco: I don’t think what I’m doing is confusing. It’s no more confusing than what Mathew Barney does, or Mike Kelley, or Paul McCarthy, or Sacha Baron Cohen. What is confusing is that I’m an actor in mainstream film and the people that usually comment on mainstream film are idiots, and they don’t try to think outside of their pop-culture commentaries. It’s so easy to criticize contemporary art from the outside: ‘Douglas Gordon slowed down Psycho so it’s 24-hours long?  That’s easy!  I can do that.’ That’s how the morons in the blogosphere try to critique my work. But the great thing about it is, is that their critiques are part of my work. I like that they are confused. I like that they make fun of what I’m doing. It’s a beautiful reflection of where our culture is at the moment.

Oh, James Franco, I don’t find Dicknose in Paris confusing, I find it hilarious! I love James Franco’s work (the visible stuff, anyway). But that’s probably because we both went to the same school of fine ascots. “Pip pip, old chap — been keeping up with the fellows from the old monoclery?” Anyway, you can find the rest of the interview here, but in the interests of brevity, I would consider this question the fart huffingest:

Flaunt: Your recent work (self-referential, video video-ing the video-er, etc.), much like that described by Nicolas Bourriaud and practiced by Dominique Gonzalez-Foerster, seems to invoke relational aesthetics, an inclusion/participation of the viewer—‘You’re as much a part of this as I am,’ so to speak. Still, you seem to be quite selective with who that viewer should be, and how that participant should contribute. Are you interested in including the public, or someone at random, in your work? Why or why not?

See, journalists? That’s how you ask an open-ended question. And that’s to say nothing of a later query prefaced with the interviewer’s notion that “contemporary oppression is much more individualized, or laden with technological change.” Sounds fun!

Anyway, let’s get to the ass stuff!

First, my favorite new gif, which I like to call “Goatse Baboon”:

[Source]

And here’s probably the world’s greatest calf tattoo (thanks, Pauly):