The original William Tell legend is kind of like the Swiss equivalent of Braveheart (but more fictionalized), or Robin Hood. Basically, it goes, the Austrian Habsburgs were trying to colonize William Tell’s neck of Switzerland in 1307. The new Austrian sheriff came to town, put his hat on a flag in the town square, and said everyone had to bow to it. William Tell didn’t bow, so the sheriff captured his son and as punishment, made him shoot an apple off the kid’s head. William Tell split the apple in twain, then later killed the sheriff, inspired a revolt against the Habsburgs, and I assumed banged chicks and dunked his balls in the fondue (a traditional Swiss celebration). It’s your prototypical medieval badass story. Now it’s coming to the silver screen, because there’s nothing Hollywood loves better than a story of Swiss exceptionalism, and who better to bring such a story to life than the director of Yogi Bear and star of Furry Vengeance?

To the blockquote! (*slips on banana peel, falls on whoopie cushion, pees pants, bird poops on face*)

Eric Brevig previously directed Fraser in the 3D hit Journey to the Center of the Earth, and also helmed Yogi Bear. Brevig is more than capable of shooting the splitting of an apple in 3D; he graduated to director from the position of visual effects supervisor on such films as Total Recall, Pearl Harbor, Men in Black and The Day After Tomorrow. Producer Todd Moyer said that he sparked to the idea of reteaming Fraser and Brevig. “Family action adventure is exactly what Brendan and Eric do best,” he said. “Eric’s skills and experience will make this film compete with any studio film.” The film is now eying a mid-March 2012 start in Castel Studios in Romania and on location in Switzerland. The budget is upped to $27 million and Chad and Evan Law are tweaking their script. [Deadline]

So this is going to be a 3D, medieval action movie, and it costs $27 million. How the hell did Conan the Barbarian cost $90 million again? Was it Rose McGowan’s forehead budget? I never understand this math stuff. Anyway, I’m sure this will be at least as historically accurate as Paul WS Anderson’s steam punk Three Musketeers. And by that I mean I’ll be surprised if it’s not called “Will.i.am Tell 3D” by the time they finish the script. A story of a musical revolt set in a contemporary urban potentate, it could be.

[gif courtesy of our own Stinky Peet]