RADICAL!
Personally, I love sorority chicks. For one thing, they take pride in their physical appearances , and for another, they’re easily fooled (IMPORTANT QUALITIES). Yet still, a lot people ask me, “Vince, is there anyone more gullible and enthusiastic-to-a-fault than sorority chicks?” To which I would answer yes. Sorority chicks who volunteer for their school’s Panhellenic Council. It’s twice the responsibility of junior high student council with half the political power! Why not? Yay, it’ll be fun, break out the puffy paint! Anyway, just such a group of girls from the University of Alabama made a video for Rush Week, which you can watch below. It has pretty much everything I look for in a sorority recruitment video:
- Star wipes!
- Circle wipes!
- Grid wipes!
- Front-to-back wipes!
- Record scratch sound effects!
- Nice white girls in clumsy, exaggerated parody of rap culture!
- A call to action to “Go Greek!” (That’s slang for butt secks, tee hee!)
- White chicks with no rhythm!
- “Parents are missin’!”
- A Rebecca Black parody!
- Actual black parody!
I could go on, but suffice to say, it is magnificent. If you find Chet Haze videos not nearly uncomfortable enough, than this is the video for you. And there’s not a single minority! Not even an Asian! How is that even possible? This “University of Alabama…” are we sure it’s a college?
You think they purposely found a girl who actually has a MORE grating voice than Rebecca Black for the Rebecca Black parody? Because if so, I’m kind of impressed.
Call me, ladies. What? Hey, I like white people sh*t.
Aw, their enthusiasm, it’s contagious. BURNSY! READY THE FLIP CUPS!
[via BroBible]
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that is just awful, grandpa Hitler in Argentina sent me an email saying he was very very disappointed
You Mu’s really know how to parody!
Fail Pie.
With those tee´s their singing a Rebecca Black Flag song.
I never thought a group of young, blonde sorority girls could make my penis go so soft so quickly
LOLz! It’s almost like Alabama’s full of fucking halfwits!
This is the life we chose, the life we lead. And there is only one guarantee: none of us will see Heaven.
Tuscaloosa, Alabama will have to do.
The only thing more uncomfortable than this is the high-pitched shrieking that fills the auditorium of the rush event in which this was displayed.
Wow, I didn’t even notice that dog PSed in at first…
Smartly left out back-to-front wipes; they don’t need any more UTIs.
Y’all are being kind of harsh. I’m sure they have one black friend who said it was cool.
Guy’cha! That huge cast-iron elephant Gary Oldman uses to burn retards alive in is starting to seem like a really good idea! Like, even more so!
i cant even watch this
“And there’s not a single minority! Not even an Asian! How is that even possible?”
They’re all in the library talking on their cell phones, of course.
Somewhere in the world there’s a black muslim named Pan X who is confused as f*ck right now.
Yay, it’ll be fun, break out the puffy paint!
Oh, god. Junior year of college, I shared a house with two sorority girls, and there was SO MUCH PUFFY PAINT. Also, glitter. If they could put Greek letters and their mascot on something, they would.
I haven’t seen anything this white since Are We There Yet?
It’s things like this that make it so us whites will never be allowed to use the N word.
They’re so white they make the new site design seem pleasantly low-key.
How many of these bitches do you think Mark Ingram fucked with is Heisman trophy? I’m guessing all of them.
whoa, they have a **** ton of sororities
Not a week goes by that I don’t curse myself for not going to university in the states. It’s like a shooting gallery…
Holy crap. Usually ignorant, wide eyed, barely legal college girls who get drunk from the fumes off my breath get me totally hard. But these chicks gave me the big rubbery one. I DO like the one in the red hat who was taking this all seriously, like she could really sing or something. Hey baby, did you know old Jack here is a music producer? That’s right, girl and I got to tell you, for real…you the BOMB yo. I’ve got a studio back at my crib. What’s your number baby? You want somfinna drink? Yeah…that’s it. WELCOME TO ERFFF.
Ah, so this is why pro athletes get away with not paying child support to their college sweethearts! ROLL TIDE!
“Front-to-back wipes!”
Front-to-back wipes are the best. Nobody wants to deal with a shitty cooter.
I’ve never wanted to see a grenade roll into a group of people more than I did at the end of this video
I used to think that the traitorous fuck-stain known as Nick Saban was the worst thing about Alabama. Now I know I was wrong.
Geaux Tigers.
Even if we lose to Bama we will still win because LSU students have yet to do anything this fucking terrible.
Who else is shocked there wasn’t any black face in that?
[msmagazine.com]
We did this, which is waaaaaaaaay better.
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I HATE BAMA SO MUCH.
Oh white people!
Look at it this way, these sorts of recurring embarrassments are the trade-offs of owning the universe!
And there’s not a single minority!
I know. What’s up with that? White people always have black friends in beer commercials.
These chicks are so white I’m surprised they don’t sparkle in daylight.
In England, they’re using this video to scare Malcolm McDowell straight.
Come on now, ladies. Those oversized t-shirts are so unflattering. Just … take ‘em off.
I hate everything about that video so much.
I’m just shocked there’s another LSU fan on this f’n site.