Fright Night

Rotten Tomatoes: 76%

Gratuitous Review Quotes:

“’Fright Night’ is different. It stands apart from the rehash pack by accomplishing something rival remakes rarely do: It improves on the premise it has been handed, producing a modernized version of a decades-old story that’s superior to its predecessor in virtually every aspect.” – Sean O’Connell, Washington Post

“It was wonderful, a fantastic tribute to my favorite 80s horror movie.” – Me, as I saw it earlier today and I’m ever so giddy.

Armchair Analysis: I loved this movie the first time and now I love the remake. If you’ve never seen the original – starring Chris Sarandon, the guy from “Herman’s Head,” and a young, surprisingly hot Marcy D’Arcy – you probably won’t understand why the trailer for the new film makes it look so cheesy, but that’s all part of the charm. To this day, I still want my neighbor to be a vampire. Or a wrestler from G.L.O.W.

One Day

Rotten Tomatoes: 30%

Gratuitous Review Quotes:

“They are completely wrong for each other. Which, of course, also makes them completely right for each other. His impulsiveness breaks her out of her drab severity. Her seriousness pulls him back to earth. They make each other better.

“Few films ‘get’ the strange, intertwining bonds of affection quite so effortlessly, although the episodic structure keeps the drama from flowing nicely. And the story — adapted by David Nicholls from his novel — could certainly use more fleshing out.” – Stephen Whitty, The Star-Ledger, presumably while making armpit farts

Armchair Analysis: A guy and a girl meet on their graduation day and they get together one day every year for the next 20 years. Basically, it sounds like the most organized booty call ever. Too bad it’s also such a ludicrous idea. Seriously, no guy is going to go out of his way to schedule one specific day out of each year to meet up with the same girl. That’s the kind of focus we set aside for fantasy football and Christmas.