No real surprises in this weekend’s box office returns, so I’m excited to report that this post is even more boring than usual. Rise of the Planet of the Apes, in its second weekend, dropped 49.8% from its opening (about average for a blockbuster) and narrowly held off The Help in its first weekend for the top spot. If only The Help had gotten Andy Serkis in a motion-capture suit to help animate the overwhelming sense of noblesse oblige, perhaps things would’ve been different. It’s a shame, really. I love it when hot white chicks solve racism. (AH STILL LURVE YOU, EMMA STOANE, YER CHANGIN’ THIS BOY’S LAHFE!)

Elsewhere, 5nal Destination had the distinction of being the first Final Destination sequel to open weaker than its predecessor, a bit of news I like to think of as “holy sh*t, no wonder they keep making these turds.” Meanwhile, Glee: The 3D Concert Movie opened even weaker than The Jonas Brothers 3D Concert Experience, probably on account of being moderately less gay. Glee 3D sold less than half a million tickets, but what do they expect trying to open the same weekend as The Gathering of the Juggalos? That’s probably where all the Glee fans were. I got an invite to a “singalong” showing of this a few weeks ago, and… wow. Just wow. I like music and all, but not nearly enough to want to hear anyone in the world sing along to it at every opportunity. I feel like half of pop culture now is that chick at the bar who won’t stop dancing even when she’s in line for the bathroom. Bitch, cut that sh*t out, we know you’re having fun, stop spilling my drink.

This Week
Last Week
Title
StudioWeekend Gross% ChangeTheater Count / ChangeAverageTotal GrossBudget*Week #
11Rise of the Planet of the ApesFox$27,500,000-49.8%3,691+43$7,451$104,876,000$932
2NThe HelpBV$25,525,000-2,534-$10,073$35,399,000-1
3NFinal Destination 5WB (NL)$18,400,000-3,155-$5,832$18,400,000-1
42The SmurfsSony$13,500,000-34.8%3,427+32$3,939$101,546,000$1103
5N30 Minutes or LessSony$13,000,000-2,888-$4,501$13,000,000-1
63Cowboys & AliensUni.$7,613,000-51.6%3,310-444$2,300$81,476,000$1633
75Captain America: The First AvengerPar.$7,125,000-45.3%2,835-785$2,513$156,885,000$1404
87Crazy, Stupid, Love.WB$6,930,000-42.3%2,635-385$2,630$55,402,000$503
96Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2WB$6,875,000-44.8%2,414-761$2,848$356,961,000-5
104The Change-UpUni.$6,219,000-54.0%2,913-$2,135$25,751,000$522
11NGlee The 3D Concert MovieFox$5,700,000-2,040-$2,794$5,700,000-1

[via Box Office Mojo]