Samuel L. Jackson is widely (and deservedly) respected as an Oscar-nominated, multiple award-winning actor who can deliver the word “motherf*cker” better than anyone in the world. And yet, for all the fame and fortune and credibility he’s accumulated, he probably couldn’t name all the movies he made last month. He’s the only man in the world who could go to a strip club and make it rain paychecks. Proving that he’ll agree to star in literally anything, he stars in this latest trailer for Arena, alongside underwear spokesperson Kellan Lutz, a Twilight castmember so blandly repulsive the AP once confused him with Cam Gigandet. Normally you’d have to find a dog, shave its ass, and kick it backward into an open sewer for that.
David Lord finds himself forced into the savage world of a modern gladiatorial arena, where men fight to the death for the entertainment of the online masses.
A protagonist forced to take part in gladiatorial combat in a dystopian future? Possibly the least original action-movie premise outside of someone kidnapping a retired super-soldier’s wife/daughter. Of course, this only makes me like Samuel L. Jackson that much more. I get the feeling that for ten bucks, he’d come to my apartment and sing “Buttercup” until I fell asleep.
“We’re reinventing the very notion of what it means to be totally generic!” -Producers of Arena.
[via ScreenJunkies]
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Damn, and here I was really hoping this would be a remake of the awesomely bad movie “Arena” from ’89.
I’ve come up with a drinking game for this movie.
Here are the rules:
When the opening credits start, leave the movie theater and go to a bar. Then, start drinking.
It’s pronounced Lootz. No one in Hollywood can figure this out Why? Because he’s not Jewish. In fact, he looks like Hitler’s posterboy.
The Mighty Feklahr often yells “NIAGRA FALLS!” to initiate urination.
*huffs jenkem
Oh, what were you baktags talking aboot?
LOL, I told Kellan Lutz that shaved pussy was the best, so the little fag went out and got a Donskoy cat!
This is Samuel L. Jackson. He’s pretty badass. Look, he’s in movies all over the place.
This paycheck is for a really bad movie. Do you think Samuel L. Jackson cares? Samuel L. Jackson ain’t care! Samuel L. Jackson don’t give a shit. He just takes what he wants.
Samuel Jackson is the black Michael Caine. I can’t wait until he finally gets his first Oscar.
Jacksploitation: (n) A film with very little real cinematic merit and is generally poorly made, but is partially redeemed by Samuel L. Jackson being in it.
(Examples: Snakes on a Plane, The Long Kiss Goodnight, a shitload more)
Samuel L Jackson washed my car yesterday for a fiver. He was happy to do it as well as about 5 people were watching him at the time, that’s 3 more than the people who saw “jumper” at the cinemas.
“honey..where’s my super suit!?”
Mortal F*** That! [cue techno music]
Samuel Jackson is the black Michael Caine. I can’t wait until he finally gets his first Oscar.I am a 28 years old doctor, mature and beautiful.and now I am seeking a good man who can give me real love , so i got a username Lindasunny2002 on–a’ge’l'es’s'da’te.c óm–.it is the first and best club for y’ounger women and old’er men, or older women and y’ounger men,to int’eract with each other. Maybe you wanna ch’eck ‘it out or tell your friends!
If there’s one thing I learned from Gamer and Death Race it’s that I won’t waste my money to watch crap like this. Unless it’s $1 at redbox.
*swipes card*
[machine noises]
OOO WA-A-A-A
Sam Jacksons scheduled to be at the opening of a car wash in Indiana next week.
he’s tired of these spots on the motherf***N true coat
seriously though, what an overrated film-hoe he is. as far as im concerned, the only character he ever played that truly resonated was Jules.
but that script was so well written that ryan dunn’s ashes coulda got an oscar nodd for the way it sat in the ashtray while vincent talked about the metric system. (too soon?)
1:25 mark . . . I’ve got no audio at werk but somebody please tell me SLJ and his hoes are dancing to Rebecca Black’s Friday.