
As talented an actress and as cool a lady as Tilda Swinton is, I always thought she looked a bit like an alien baby. In the latest issue of W, she’s traded that in for the Lex Luthor-looking thing you see above. I didn’t read the full profile, probably because the headline was “When it comes to acting – and dressing – Tilda Swinton is literally out of this world” (Really? who wrote this, Pete Hammond?). But the look seems to suit her. Hey, is that a hand vagina? That’s funny, I’ve been known to rock a little handgina myself, though I usually make mine with one hand. Ha, stars. They’re just like us.



She looks like this.
Is this one of those magic art pics? I keep unfocusing my eyes hoping to see the woman in the pic that people claim is there.
Prince called, he wants his… eh, you know what, just keep it.
Nothing compares,
nothing compares to ewwwwww.
She looks like one of the Observers from Fringe. All she needs is a fedora.
One time I gave my girlfriend a Tilda Swinton. She couldn’t taste anything for three days and the cat is still scared of our bedroom.
That ‘Hand Vaginas’ tag is going to get a lot of lip service.
I was going to go with And you’ll always be my whore
Cause you’re the one that i adore but I think I’ll just go ahead and start touching myself.
What if the hand vagina is the female equivalent of the dismissive wank?
Nevermind. Why would women need that when they can’t orgasm, amiright?
The designer of that number is Engorgea O’Queef.
My hand vagina won’t stop fingering itself.
Stupid future, being terrifying and stuff.
Tilda Swinton and Steve Buscemi need to do a buddy comedy asap – it would be scary funny.
Handgina is first base in “An Uncle’s Guide to Babysitting”
Great, now I’ve got Midnight Oil’s “Beds are Burning” stuck in my head.
Thanks a lot, Cueball.
I just thought it was another dickbender movie. I meant airbender
Freudian slip?
Uh, Tilda, when I said you should shave, that it would be fun, I didn’t mean your head.
If Bryan Singer saw this eleven years ago, Patrick Stewart would have been out of a job.
I’m pretty sure she’s going to start “tuning” at any second and this city is going to get all kinds of messed up.
My purple pain makes her purple rain
My purple vein made her purple stain
A purple Zane meant the Phantom came
I didn’t know they were making a Smashing Pumpkins movie.
She looks really worried about Rufus Sewell’s ability to queue. And Keifer Sutherland’s stutter.
“Handgina” could potentially be Coca-Cola™ to “Fleshlight’s” Pepsi™. You better trademark that before I do.
This is what Tarsem Singh sees right before he passes out/blows his load.
“I AM THE EARTH’S DISTENDED RECTUM SHITTING OUT AN ANGRY HERMAPHRODITE”
Holy shit! Is that a half-hatched egg?!?!
They’re never gonna do a Dragonball Z movie right.
Clem, the Dark City creepers was the first thing that popped into my head too. That movie is actually pretty underrated. Also, the one guy of those creepers was named Mr. Hand, right? See? Relevant to the post.
Don’t avert your gaze from her eyes; for if you do she’ll punch you in the arm and exclaim “Caught you looking!”
“I’m sorry Tilda, we love the direction you want to take with the role, but I think we’re going to go with Ralph Fiennes as Voldemort.”
At least the cast for the new Dragon Ball Z movie is looking good.