I know you're probably sick of hearing about it by now, but I've got just a couple more batches of pictures from Comic-Con to get through before we can finally put this thing to bed and get back to normal posting. (With the new site design, I believe you can click pictures for enlarged versions).
The Root of All Art
So Comic-Con has become known as this huge event where movie studios and TV outlets go to announce their new projects and pander to the "true fans." And that part's pretty much all bullsh*t and empty hype. But if there is still something great about it, it's seeing some accountant or software engineer who's spent the last 28 months of his life and countless money and man hours turning his rascal scooter into a working Delorean. And for the one or two days of the year they get to show off, those guys are the ABSOLUTE PIMP SH*T, with strangers literally shoving celebrities out of the way to take their picture. I saw one guy dressed as a centaur with FULL-SIZED HORSE LEGS THAT F*CKING MOVED WHEN HE WALKED.
It brings me indescribable joy to imagine the amount of hard hours in the garage workshop that must've gone into this (not to mention the mechanical aptitude). I think about the sacrifices he had to make to get it finished -- his affairs falling into neglect, his personal life going to hell, his wife probably busting his balls and not really understanding the whole endeavor. "Tom, what are you even DOING down there!?"
"What am I doing? What am I DOING?! It's life-sized horse legs! They move when I walk! I'm turning myself into a REAL-LIFE CENTAUR!!! How can you even ask me a question like what am I doing!? THE CENTAUR CARES NOT FOR YOUR TONE!"
And when you think about it, that's sort of the essence of art right there. Some guy in his basement, creating something no one understands, and even he doesn't really understand, that he feels compelled to keep creating because it just feels right to him in a way that he can't quite explain. Why? What do you mean, 'why?' There is no why. If you see it and ask why, you've already missed the point. I guess what I'm trying to say is, Comic-Con Centaur Guy really changed my whole perspective on sh*t.
The Cure for Cynicism
And just when I'd start to wonder what the f*ck I was supposed to be doing here (Going to boring panels that are just glorified Entertainment Tonight bits? Sitting in on round table interviews to hear the same publicist-vetted gems you hear in every interview?), I'd see someone so happy to be dressed up, for whom putting on a costume was such a transformative experience, that their eyes would light up with pride and they'd happily jump into whatever mini-performance they thought would make the best picture, doing it just because. I came to this realization about two days into the Con. I was all but done with it, the crowds, the noise, the planning, the posturing, the overwhelming hype. Ugh. And that was right about the time I ran into these people. It was combination of people, but they were the first, and I remember it distinctly. I was waiting in a sh*tty line for fake, marked-up Starbucks coffee at the time, and just the looks on their faces when I took their picture instantly changed the sh*tty mood I'd been in for the better part of 48 hours. To be honest, I got a little choked up afterwards. It sounds stupid, I know, not to mention dramatic, but you'd be surprised how nice it feels to suddenly feel like you understand something, to remember that you're still capable of empathy, and not just alienation and wanting to shove some troll out of the way because she's blocking the Cinnabon. What the hell are these people gawking at, anyway? A Firefly panel? Ugh, that show sucks.
(I actually have no idea about Firefly, I was just trying to make a point).
The Rise of Steam Punk
Ah yes and the steam punks. Who could forget the steam punks? This is how you know hipster culture has infected nerd culture, where it's not enough to dress like you're from the future, you now have to dress like some old-timey retro version of the future from some book no one's read.
"We used to be a barbershop quartet, we just added leather and gadgetry."
Nice to meet you, I'm actually part of a steam punk collective from Cleveland. The Cleveland Steam Punks, we call ourselves.
That's right, it's a steam punk hat catalog. Hey, those things don't just make themselves.
That's right, you can wear your lambskin Arronax hat anywhere and do just about anything. It's that versatile! You'll be the most whimsical, stylish gent in yoga class!
STEAM PUNKS F*CKING LOVE GRAPES!
Goggles and guns. What are steam punkers always shooting at, anyway? And what do those guns do? Do they shoot... steam?
Freaky contact lenses will never go out of style. Nor will exposed cleavage.
I guarantee there was some freaky vampire sex going on this weekend. My God, you guys, the furry orgies.
That blue dude is scary as hell. He looks like a molesty alien priest. My, this was a humorous caption.
I thought this fellow had a particularly presumptuous codpiece.
Costume schmostume, if you've got a vaguely superhero-related bustier, you're good to go. Not that I'm complaining.
He said the Dolphins were "the most evil football team in the galaxy." But who has a rivalry with the Dolphins? Don't you have to be good before a rivalry can develop?
I wish Burnsy had been here. He hate-loves the Dolphins. Or maybe it's love-hates, I'm not really sure how it works in Florida.
I don't know who these girls are, what they were dressed as, or what they were doing. My camera just spun towards the boobs and started taking pictures before I knew what it was doing.
And hey, why does the angel have those freaky contact lenses? Do angels all have freaky demon eyes like that? Heaven must be scary.
Poor form, dude. Everyone knows you're supposed to hover your hand a half inch from their skin to avoid contact.
The lords of the round table pause for ye olde soft pretzels. I was very sad to learn that these guys were actually professionals, and were at Comic-Con to promote the Knights of Badassdom. It shouldn't make a huge difference whether people are dressing up because they want to or because they're being paid to promote something and their costumes were made by a professional costumer, but... Well, it actually makes all the difference in the world.
Here's the trailer for that, by the way:
Looks way less metal than The Wild Hunt. Though I am excited to see Peter Dinklage in a comedy. That dude is one kick-ass dwarf.
Actual quote, right as I was taking a picture: "Okay, now I'm going to take a picture for my co-workers, but I don't want any creeps trying to take pictures of my ass!"
... And this is the picture immediately following. Words cannot adequately express how much or why I love this picture, but I do. Dammit, I so do.
Move along, nothing to see here, just sitting down to a relaxing lunch with friends. Needs more feral child
JUGGALO PANHANDLER! JUGGALO PANHANDLER!
This shot doesn't do the full scope of the crowd justice, but I do like the guy in stilts in the background.
The Vader Pimp and Boba Fett Pimp are old news, but I enjoyed the hell out of Midwestern Tourist-in-Hawaii Vader.
I don't know what this woman's supposed to be, but I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume she owns cats.
Yes, she shaved the entire front of her skull for this costume, which I thought was pretty baller. I believe she's Aang from the Last Airbender, which I know because I sat through that horrific Shyamalan film. I can only imagine how much harder it must've been to sit through for an actual fan. She's probably still grieving. The studio should pay Last Airbender fans for grief counseling after that thing.
This was a very hairy man with nipple rings in a Viking-inspired thong speedo with tail. He was the only person all day who just speed-walked past me when I tried to take his picture. You'd think a guy in a thong and nipple rings would like the attention.
CORGI IN A BASKET! CORGI IN A BASKET! The lady pushing this little guy was understandably startled when I let out an audible squeal and frantically fumbled with my camera to snap this in time.
That's Blake Anderson from Workaholics in a bear costume that I can only assume was Wicker Man-inspired. Free costume idea: Nic Cage in a bear suit with a female sidekick with a black eye.
I'm not sure what's going here, but any costume that necessitates a pastie seems alright by me. I'm not 100% certain that's a girl, but for the boobs I'd probably be willing to take a gamble.
What, bro, did your mom make that costume for you? No leather? No metal? No goggles or pulleys? Bush league, dude. Come back later, this isn't amateur hour.
Sailor Moon? True story, I had no idea what Sailor Moon was before this. Yes, I am aware that I am a total fraud.
I choose to look at this in all its cuteness and assume that guy is the father or big brother. But it could be a secret dwarf hooker under there, you never know.
Okay, okay, they look sweet. Sorry, ladies, I didn't mean that you were literal "skanks," it was just something to say. Seriously though, what the hell is Fringe?
I have that same outfit, only without the trident. I wear it to play indoor soccer.
For the last time, dude, I'm not touching your wand. And put some socks on, that carpet is filthy.
I buy those same socks a few sizes too large so I can put my junk through the holes.
I'm guessing the kid in the middle is dressed as "too young for my parents to let me watch Kick-Ass." Nice to see SOMEone's still doing some parenting around here.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a man a giant backpack shaped like a fish and he has a fine place for storing robes and tunics.
Okay, let's try to break this down. They're wearing cat ears. And red wigs. And they're dressed like... schoolgirls? Conservative schoolgirls? And one appears to be proposing... I give up, dude. I'm actually more confused than when we started.
Oh come on, you can't just tear a cleavage hole in a wifebeater, thrown on some fishnets, and call it a costume. What is this, Arizona State?
What's with all the different lenses? Is there some component of steam punk that involves grading gem stones? I'm so confused.
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#57 Devin Townsend?
I thought he was on tour.
#45
You startled her all right. Right into an early labor.
There is no slide #48 for me.
How come there are no sexy nuns at this Convent Center?
#37 Psylocke from X-Men
What? Don’t look at me like that.
#44 X-23
Listen, I only know this because I play video games.
Damnit Vince, this is way too heartfelt. I mean I masturbate while crying all the time, but from tears of compassion?
#8 – the ‘Curio’.
I have a beautiful hand-stained gradient, too: my boner angles to the left, and I eat a LOT of Cheetos.
@31: Did she mean you?
@32: That guy looks like a ghost. Was he your conscience, telling you not to take the ass pic? Then again, he looks latino, and they love asses…
37 is Psylocke from the X-Men. She stabs people in the brain with “psionic knives,” and coincidentally gives teenagers boners.
@44: X-23
@47: Wearing a Hello Kitty costume has gotta be like the Asian version of the Captain America costume.
That little Firefly insult will have resulted in at least 3 hours of hate mail from Whedon fans by this time tomorrow.
I buy those same socks a few sizes too large so I can put my junk through the holes.
Take it from me, dude, large socks only make it look smaller.
The hot asian chick in #37 is Psylocke from X-Men
“Seriously, what the hell is Fringe?”
I’ll hold him down, Patty; you whip him with red vines.
#10-that’s really a pretty cool Lady Deathstrike costume!
47 looks a little down…
:(
#37 is the SECOND Psylocke from XMen.
*still Nerd overlord of Filmdrunk*
RE: #48, Morty – you are SOOOO missing out, man.
*ahem*
My sources tell #37 is ‘Psylocke’ from X-Men. SCOOP!
#49 They’re dressed as Venusian babes from the book Bizarro Au Go-Go the book is pretty outrageous [bizarroaugogo.com]
#2 We’re all in agreement that’s a dude right? Looks just like the tranny from BASEketball. Man, what a classic.
Correction, #3. I’ll show myself out.
What the hell is the Dalai Lama doing at Comic-Con?
Lince is the Dalai Lama???
Does anyone else think that the guy Blake Anderson is speaking to in #46 is probably Anders Holm, also of Workaholics
Fringe is only the best sci-fi on TV.
*silently eats Red Vines to hold back the nerd outrage*
#41 Tell me more about the girl on the cellphone with no pants
…and your lack of Fringe knowledge fails me
That’s Psylocke after she was mystically altered from a british chick into a psychic-knive-wielding asian ninja.
Every costume I don’t recognize makes me feel a bit better about myself.
the bear coat is from the show
That Juggalo panhandler can’t be legit. His spelling isn’t bad enough to be a real Juggalo.
Vince’s utter lack of nerd knowledge makes the non sequiturs all the more fuckin’ hilarious. There’s a certain level of innocence in the irreverence!
Oh honey, I’m going to walk around with you next year and mention what character someone is. Or at least who they are if they’re from comics or video games.
My pockets of nerd knowledge are strange and unpredictable. If it’s videogame, anime, manga, or comic book-related, I almost certainly won’t know it. Thought I’m surprisingly well versed in Star Trek TNG or anything related to comedy or adult swim.
I really did need a translator. I thought about it many times throughout the con.
There’s a fiver in it if you paint yourself blue and stroll around as Dr. Manhattan. You know you want to.
I hear steam punk is really hot right now in Cleveland.
My favorite costumes were the guys who were dressed up like Leisure Suit Larry… Oh, wait, no, my bad… those were just film execs.
I was accidentally listening to Bon Iver while reading your impassioned plea for DIY costumes as the last true expression of inner truth. The cumulative emo effect caused eyeliner to spontaneously draw itself around my eyes and my lips. Get a grip man.
Vince, how could you not show the prices of those hats from the catalog?
I had to take my ADD pills so that I could maintain the level of attention span to resize and crop all those pictures, and it tends to make me overly earnest. I REGRET NOTHING!
Cheap jokes about the Dolphins. Very funny. Why didn’t you post the pics of Alex Smith dressed as Princess Leia?
Does anyone ever dress as original Psylocke? Sure, she looks like a Jem character, but the 80′s are in.
That’s my cousin on the right in slide 38 – he’s a hobbit I think. Unless it goes Pew Pew I really don’t pay much attention.
Alex Smith was GOING to come as Princess Leia, but it looked weird because his hands were too small.
My steam punk get-up is only listening to United Nations while ironing.
Seriously though, what the fuck is steam punk? Is it like Luke Perry in the Fifth Element?
#57
They hide their finest bean. Prepare the attack!
#57 – needs less nose.
Regarding the frightening smurf float: I may not have watched the smurfs as a kid, but I definitely don’t remember their hats being so foreskin-y.
One would think that, if it represents close to 50% of his clothes, any self-respecting smurf would iron that hat before he went out in public.
#3 – Why isn’t Chelsea Clinton wearing her wedding ring?
#38 assassin’s Creed assassin, and a Hobbit.
#3 is Codex from “the Guild”. Which is, of course, Felicia Day’s character. Felicia Day is, of course, in Buffy, Dollhouse, and is a star of Dr Horrible, all of which were created by Joss Whedon. Whedon also created … Firefly. Isn’t it cool the way that post looped around?
I mean, pish, nerds.
#40 is a Nitro-Splicer from BioShock
The hot asian chick in #37 is Psylocke from X-Men.I am a 28 years old doctor, mature and beautiful.and now I am seeking a good man who can give me real love , so i got a username Lindasunny2002 on–a’ge’l'es’s'da’te.c óm–.it is the first and best club for y’ounger women and old’er men, or older women and y’ounger men,to int’eract with each other. Maybe you wanna ch’eck ‘it out or tell your friends!