"Excuse me, Ma'am? I'd be happy to check your luggage, but first I'm going to need to inspect your 'bags."
Here's part two of my Comic Con Photo Diary. This batch containing EVEN MORE CLEAVAGE! With EVEN LESS PANEL COVERAGE! Actually, after about three hours of walking around taking pictures of every sexy, revealing, funny, or cool costume I could find, I found that my peripheral vision had become so finely attuned to shapeliness or cleavage of any kind (yes, even more so than usual), that any time a voluptuous lass hove into my field of view, I found I'd spun around to face her with my camera out asking if I could take a picture before my conscious mind had even caught up to what I was doing. Let me just say that if the busty lady in question isn't actually wearing a costume at the time, this can lead to an unpleasant situation. I take full blame for that. In fact, that's rule number one for Comic-Con: if you want to take a picture of an attractive lady, first check to make sure she's wearing a costume or is a promo girl of some kind, otherwise your picture request will just seem creepy, confusing, pathetic, and strange. But FilmDrunkards, I make these mistakes so that you don't have to. (Call me sexist if you must, my girlfriend took half of these.)
Scroll on for more, starting with the Slave Leias, for obvious reasons (MO MONEY, MO MONEY, MO MONEY!). This won't be my last batch, so look out for that sometime this afternoon or tomorrow. See also Part One here (and last year's Comic-Con galleries here, here, here, and here).
Later on in this gallery, I tried to throw in some cute photos, so that just when you were about to be disgusted with me for being a huge perv (and no arguments there, really) you couldn't fully hate me. Will it work? Keep scrolling to find out!
"Aw, yeah, ladies love an airbrushed skull shirt."
There was such a huge cloud of dudes taking pictures surrounding the Slave Leia group that Joss Whedon could've climbed atop a human pyramid made of the Avengers cast and barely been noticed.
I tried to make a drinking game out of this where I'd swig from my flask each time I saw a Slave Leia (yes, you can play drinking games alone, hadn't you heard?), but they were more sparse this year, so I had to change it to include any costume I recognized. It was a good game.
After this, I gave them a few lines of blow and we played a spirited game of tetherball.
How come the Leias never show up with a Jabba? It's not like there's a shortage of fat guys here.
"Hey! Is that Robert Rodriguez?" I shouted.
Years later, Timmy would still remember where he was the moment his balls dropped.
As I sidenote on this, the biggest question on my girlfriend's mind was whether girls wear underwear under their Slave Leia costumes. I still can't really tell, but then women's underwear have been known to frighten and confuse me like one of the 2001 apes. (*shrieks, tries to hit bra strap with chicken bone*)
Here's the Medusa from Bellflower. I saw it at Sundance, and while it's definitely a very cool movie with nudity and flamethrowers, I wasn't quite as high on it as most of the other reviewers seem to be. That said, the car is cool as sh*t, and from what he said at Sundance, writer/director Evan Glodell built it himself. There's another car in the movie that has a whiskey dispenser in the dash. I can't imagine that's street legal.
Sadly I wasn't able to get a shot of it in action, but those pipes are where the flames shoot out.
You can pick up a lady in it, but she has to be okay with sitting on canisters of flammable material and a fire extinguisher.
And here you can see the reinforced Kryptonite steam turbines with chrome double-overhead whammy brackets. I think. I'm not really good with cars.
OMG OMG, it's Michael Emerson, aka Ben Linus from Lost1!1!ONE1! He was just hanging out, taking pictures with fans, keeping it real as sh*t. Afterwards we rolled a few dice games, smoked blunts, and talked about pussy. And just to show that Hollywood hasn't made him go soft, he slapped me hard across the mouth when I got too lewd when complimenting his old lady. I thanked him for not giving me the full closed fist, but I can personally report that his pimp hand is strong. I would say strong to quite strong.
I can't remember what this girl was promoting, but she was quite enthusiastic, and I dug that about her.
YEEEEAAAAAAAH, IT'S DOCTAH ROCKZO! I DO COCAAAAAAAINE! Ahh, finally, a costume I recognize (from Metalocalypse). I bet you'd pick up lots of chicks in a costume like this. Because the ladies would assume you have cocaine. And as my father taught me when I was a child, ladies love cocaine.
Awwwwww. Probably the cutest damned picture I took all weekend.
Ugh, what is this feeling? Heart... so warm...
Monday morning they go back to being mild-mannered accountants.
Admiral Steampunk, I presume? (He looks familar, but I don't know who he's supposed to be -- I just assumed steampunk from the eye goggle monocle). Why do all steampunk costumes involve goggles? I assume it's to protect from the steam? Whether it includes this guy or not, steampunk seems to be a big hit among the 35+ cosplaying crowd.
Here's a promo girl dressed up as some sort of blonde, pigtailed anime (manga?) character. Always a popular attraction. The beauty of it is that you don't have to be familiar with the art to appreciate it.
Ah yes, who could forget that old classic comic book, "Playboy," whose artwork inspired everyone from Frank Miller to Todd MacFarlane.
"So nice to meet you, real-live woman!"
I kid, I kid. Seriously though, guy, that is an awesome shirt.
It's not like Ms. Taylor here was wearing lingerie or a skimpy bikini, which made it feel that much seedier when she'd wrap up in a shawl between photos. "Quick, someone sponge the nerd off me!"
Also, they were wearing a LOT of makeup.
This was one of the rare times the girls were actually sitting at their booth. It was almost as big of an attraction when they weren't there, for people to sit in their chairs pretending to be Playmates. "Haha, take a picture, Frank, this will be humorous."
A sexy... uh.... Sherlock? Sure, why not. Reminds me of my friend Jorge who used to wear a hat like that all the time back in high school. "Who are you supposed to be?" I'd ask. "Mira, I'm Churlock, homes," he used to say.
"HOLY SH*T, IS THAT GENE SIMMONS?" I yelled. No one turned around. Which all supports my thesis, people really hate Gene Simmons.
Here's a guy from Fox Five interviewing a Comic-Conner. "So, miss, my producers tell me you have blue hair. Care to comment?"
Now THIS, I'm fairly confident, is steampunk. Definitely a lot of work went into those costumes. In any case, this reminds me, the chick from Four Non Blondes was steampunk before it was cool.
Obviously that's blue-haired Sally and her sidekick, Rogelia, from Elf Quest. Pf, don't act like you don't know Elf Quest. You can't call yourself an observer of pop culture if you've never seen Elf Quest.
Here's the view of PetCo from the elevated walkway to the Hilton. Don't worry, there are more cleavage pictures coming. Consider this a think-piece for your refractory period.
Here we see Queen Devindress Q. Pumblefeather with her ancient tome of incantations. Okay fine, I have no idea.
"Be ye a fellow sorcerer, sir? For this latte is nothing short of magical."
Part of me wishes I'd done an entire gallery of people in costumes waiting for drinks at Starbucks. "Hark, wench, but I do believe my lord doth requesteth 'no foam.'"
"And I use this brass gadget for snatching candy."
Any costume gets exponentially cooler when it includes your awesome beard like this guy. Though I guess that midget-catcher thing he's carrying is pretty cool too.
ZZ Top? Totally steam punk.
Here's some Mortal Kombat people in line for Starbucks. GET OVER HERE! (*harpoons cappuccino*)
See how friendly and excited they are just to have their pictures taken? They put all their stuff down and posed just so I could have this picture. That's the best part of Comic-Con by far.
I dug the cardboard, though I'm not sure what those other costumes are. The iron crosses remind me of some other kid I saw in a full-on Nazi uniform, with swastika pins and everything. I assumed it was just for some WWII-era comic characters (and so did everyone else, it seemed). Something you could only get away with at Comic-Con. Though theoretically, if it's acceptable to dress as Darth Vader or a zombie or demons or the devil, shouldn't a Nazi costume be similarly acceptable? Hallo? Eez zeess sing on? Are zair any Jews een za audience? Hallo? ...Kirsten, I don't sink my mic ist working."
More Harleys Quinn. (I think?)
This guy was awesome. I've said it before and I'll say it again -- any costume that includes an oversized mallet is an automatic win. It helped that he was six foot seven and rocking an actual bear's head on his hand (not a live bear, but still). I'll have some video of him later -- still pics don't do him justice.
I walked away after I took these pictures of him, and from the other side of a display I could still hear "ROOOOWR! .... ROOOOWR! ... ROOOOWR!" every time a new person asked him to pose for a picture. This guy knows that you can't just show up in a costume, you gotta bring the attitude.
"Yeah, Bear Man! Hammer his ass! ...Wait, that came out wrong."
What can I say, I love watching a big ol' bear hammer a young man's ass.
Pfff, if you've seen one old-timey steampunk brass ray gun, you've seen them all.
"(*sigh*) I wish this gun could make my wife interested in my hobbies."
Yes, shiny goggles and pointy-rings, all the must-have accessories for any aspiring steam punker. Don't ask me what the Misfits patches are doing in there. I suppose the demographics may overlap, though I hate to admit it.
A big, plastic sword inside a real Military uniform. Surely this is a metaphor for something.
It was all I could do not to burst into "Space Unicorn" when I saw this guy, who you know is the head pimp in charge at every furry sex party. I have a sneaking suspicion the guy under there looks like Machine from 8MM. Fun fact: His "Marshmallow Laser" is his penis.
It's not a true costume if it doesn't work from all 360 degrees.
Oh hello there, surreptitious butt shot, nice to see you again. I mean... uh... I was trying to take a picture of that kid's... uh... backpack. Yeah, that's it. Stupid malfunctioning zoom lens.
It's nice when people pose. Makes you feel like less of a creepy perv for wanting to take a picture of a big-breasted lady in spandex. Aw, you complete me, big-breasted spandex lady.
What this guy is supposed to be is on the tip of my tongue... In any case, I'm always drawn to a man in body paint and a feather boa.
See, this gallery isn't just pervy boob shots for the boys, I made sure to save somethin' for the ladaaays. Mmmm, that bulge is delicious! Holy jeez I wanna lick it!
This Planet of the Apes costume was seamless at the eyes and the monkey lips moved when she talked. It was, in a word, creepy as f*ck. Or mega boner worthy for those with a very specific fetish. (You should see her monkey fufu!)
CHECK BACK SOON! Okay, folks, that's all the pictures I can post for now (this takes forEVER), but there are plenty more where these come from, plus a few videos.
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well it seems to me that that really hot brunette slave Leia in slide #3 and #5 won the comic con, congratulations
I don’t understand why so many women still dress like Slave Leia.
Do you how much it sucks to show up at a party where someone else is wearing the same dress? It’s the worst.
“Obviously that’s blue-haired Sally and Rogelia from Elf Quest. Pf, don’t act like you don’t know Elf Quest. You can’t call yourself an observer of pop culture if you’ve never seen Elf Quest.”
Is it weird that I know that those two are actually Asuka and Rei from Evangelion, yet I have no idea what Elf Quest is>
Question mark?
Finally Vince is back and I can say this:
Screw you for slowed down Cutie Patootie. It’s in my head and eating my soul. I can’t get it out
Patty – If every hot chick in the world wore the Slave Leia every single day, it still wouldn’t be enough.
Gross. That neck hair on the wookie photographer in # 25 is something that will haunt my dreams.
#47/48 is The Creeper.
I feel like I was actually there!
(which I could kill you for)
There’s an actual character called “The Creeper?”
I just assumed that was a nickname for any number of Comic Con attendees.
“What this guy is supposed to be is on the tip of my tongue…”
Do you think you should rephrase that?
A hefty chick dressed as Harley Quinn is normally called a “Chris Farley Quinn”.
Do they serve Dippin’ Dots? From what I hear, it’s the ice cream of the future.
*whispers (do they serve them in a comic cone?)
No cheerleaders playing “The Andorian” in the mens bathroom???
#19 – I’m gonna go with Dennis Hopper’s character in Waterworld.
Great movie. No excuse for Costner not doing his spot-on Boston accent though.
a full-on Nazi uniform, with swastika pins and everything. I assumed it was just for some WWII-era comic characters
Fun fact: In Japan it’s called “Nazi Chic” and has more to do with the Nazis’ keen fashion sense than it does with comic books. Hugo Boss™: Blitzkrieg in Style.
@spazmodic,
Not as creepy as I know they need a Shinji.
47/48 is the creeper, but he’s about one blonde dye job away from being wwe’s golddust.
i second spazmodic’s comment- i mean who goes to comicon or any anime convention and doesn’t know what NGE is? also, on 12 its a carb and scoop on a roots style blower aka horsepower hardon
Whoa, whoa, easy there Sanchez. I wasn’t ragging on Vinny (for once), I was actually, seriously wondering what the fuck is wrong with me.
I think Slave Leia on the far left used to be a Luke.
@nowacki
But was (s)he still a slave?
Whoa, Dippin’ Dots Chell0?
The future isn’t what it used to be but they were quite a revelation for me in Primm, Nevada in ’98 or ’99. Freakishly delicious.
Do they serve Dippin’ Dots? From what I hear, it’s the ice cream of the future.I am a 28 years old doctor, mature and beautiful.and now I am seeking a good man who can give me real love , so i got a username Andromeda2002 on–s’e'ek’c'ou’ga’r.c óm–.it is the first and best club for y’ounger women and old’er men, or older women and y’ounger men,to int’eract with each other. Maybe you wanna ch’eck ‘it out or tell your friends!
That guys shirt, with Han and Chewie as Calvin and Hobbes is by the incredibly talented James Hance…I highly recommend you check him out, Google Wookiee the Chew and lose your fucking mind. Oh, and I’m not James Hance btw, but sometimes I wish I was…
The blonde, pigtailed character in #20 is Mandy, the Dean Yeagle creation on the prints behind her…