Dimension Films today announced that Spy Kids 4, a film that I can only imagine is about children who are also spies, will be going “4D” with “Aromascope.” Dear Hollywood. Scent is a sense, not a dimension. You’d think you might know that, considering it’s… the name of your studio. Sigh.
Dimension Films announced today that SPY KIDS: ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD is taking moviegoers to a whole new dimension in 4D with Aromascope.
Director of the highly popular SPY KIDS franchise, Robert Rodriguez, was one of the first to re-introduce audiences to 3D since its inception in the 1950s.
This innovative and celebrated franchise will now be the first to introduce audiences to the new adventure of 4D where they will have 8 special opportunities throughout the movie to access the action interactively through smell.
“Access the action interactively through smell.” Open the kimono and soup to my nuts, at the end of the day, that could be the most overblown, meaningless bullsh*t PR sentence in the history of the written word.
The introduction of scent in the movie going experience adds to the outrageous fun by enhancing the action, adventure and comedy to take you where no film has gone before.
Oops, spoke too soon.
With each individual admission ticket, kids and parents will also receive an Aromascope card that is free of charge with easy to read numbers outlined. As the numbers flash on the movie screen the audience will rub the corresponding number on their card [wait, where do I get the number I'm supposed to rub on my card?]. When each of the 8 aromas are unleashed you will get to experience a special moment in the film and be transported into scenes in the family adventure film. This fun added attraction takes the audience beyond sight and sound and into a symphony of scents as the movie is coming to life.
Jesus, was that translated from Japanese? If awful PR writing was one of the seven deadly sins, the killer in Seven would’ve locked this guy in a tiny room and forcefed him curry until he suffocated on his own farts. And that would be justice.
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I remember seeing From Dusk Til Dawn and thinking it was in smell-o-vision, then I later found out that Danny Trejo had snuck into the theater to see his performance.
This will be just like the Pink Floyd/Wizard of Oz thing when people discover that the smell of a schoolgirl’s panties eerily match up with the entire movie.
This idea stinks.
I’m going to take a blind guy to this movie and see if I can convince him that we’re watching ‘Human Centipede’
I feel like odd smells will make it hard to keep my erection while watching spy children.
I’d bet you almost anything that one of those scents will be farts.
I’d bet you almost anything that one of those scents will be farts.
Well, now I want to see it.
I can’t wait until we’re introduced to the kids’ hilarious pair of pupppies, Scratch and Sniff.
Smelly Mexican wants to take you where no film has taken you before. Not even GI Joe.
Somewhere John Waters is huffing tranny groin with
a smile on his facehis lawyer on hold.Amyl nitrite + Spy Kids 3 > Aromascope + Spy Kids 4
Trust me on this one.
That should be “a cacaphony of scents…”.
Roman Polanski is making a children’s 4D film in Touch-o-vision.
“Robert Rodriguez is a fucking genius.”
-Stevie Nicks
To bring an extra dimension to the experience, theaters will be instructed to attach dildos to every seat that shows this film. This will help parents feel the realm of the moviegoing experience previously only metaphorically “felt” in their wallets.
MUPPETS 4D: Kermit Rising
“What’s green and smells like bacon?”
“Coming” this July
I’d go see more kid movies if they had dildo seats…
All The Thyme In The World won’t be enough to cover up the stench of this movie.
I seem to remember one of the Revenge of the Nerds movies doing this way back when. You had a stupid card to scratch and smell some things that didn’t smell like what they were supposed to. I’m sure glad all this technology we’re swimming in these days is really paying off.
Back in 1981, the John Waters film “Polyester” featured a similar scratch and sniff card, and they called the process OdorAma. I was working in the theater then and heard a lot about the stinky cards and how to find the right number to scratch at the right time. Most of the smells were BAD
You hardly need a scratch and sniff card to know that this movie will stink.
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You had a stupid card to scratch and smell some things that didn’t smell like what they were supposed to. I’m sure glad all this technology we’re swimming in these days is really paying off.