If you’ll remember, Mike Tyson’s tattoo artist, S. Victor Whitmill (a tattoo artist with an initial for a name, I wonder if he works with a monocle), sued Warner Bros over Ed Helms’ Hangover II tat at the beginning of May. A few weeks later, a judge denied the artist’s request for an injunction to stop the film from being released, but allowed the suit to go forward. Now the judge has set a trial date for February 2012, even though the DVD comes out in December. Warner Bros. may have to take out the tattoo digitally for the DVD, but only because they basically volunteered to do that to postpone the trial.
Whitmill and his lawyers at St. Louis’ Brickhouse Law Group had sought a trial in August. But Warners, in opposing that extremely expedited schedule, submitted court documents arguing that such a quick resolution wasn’t necessary because the studio plans to whitewash the offending mark from the movie after its theatrical run, thus eliminating any further alleged damages to Whitmill from his copyrighted tattoo appearing in the film.
Warner Bros. got its wish, with Judge Perry declining to set a trial date in August. But a February trial, after the planned DVD release, would require the studio to spend big to remove the tattoo from all the offending Helms scenes. From our recollection, he’s got the tattoo in pretty much every scene after the 20-minute mark or so; we don’t envy the special effects wizard charged with scrubbing the mark from each frame.
As we’ve said from the beginning, this case is probably headed for settlement way before trial. To that end, Judge Perry has scheduled a private mediation for June 16. Hopefully both sides can work out a resolution. [THR]
Jesus, did anyone else fall asleep reading that? Court sucks. Lawyers suck. How long could it possibly take to learn all the facts here? This guy made a tattoo. Warner used it in a movie. This case has a judge, right? Make a goddamned decision already. If I wanted to hear six months of “on the one hand, on the other hand” I’d watch CNN.
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Can’t wait to see the movie adaptation, Hungover Jury, Part Tattoo!
I still haven’t seen it, but wouldn’t removing the tattoo eliminate parts of the story? Couldn’t they just change it? And isn’t this a stupid lawsuit to begin with?
Oh, and obligatory comment about how I think Ed Helms is adorable.
Wasn’t the tattoo already in the first movie? Sooo… isn’t this late?
They should do like on 30 Rock and turn the tattoo into a lion with the name “Tangiers”
Did anyone else start salivating like a St. Bernard thinking about all the sweet, sweet billable hours this whole thing is creating?
Just me?
I disagree. The tattoo does look like an aborted Brobaby.
Whitmill is so full of shit, he’s putting the whole cistern on trial!
(When reached for comment, the stall replied: ‘No, you’re out of order!’)
*ahem*
“Erection, your onion!”
How’d I do?
As we’ve said from the beginning, this case is probably headed for settlement way before trial.
Oh, you think they’ll ‘ink’ a deal?
… Ugh, kill me now.
Little known fact: The baby that was the subject of Roe v. Wade grew up to be S. Victor Whitmill. *BRAAHHHMMM*
If they’d made that decision quicker, we wouldn’t even be in this mess. Abortion rules, lawyers drool.
Brickhouse Law Group demanded that, in order to make the trial go Easy, they need to make Ed Helms Three Times A Lady. Once, twice, three times a lady. Miller justs hopes he goes home a Richie man.
Whitmill* (not Miller)
Uh, I’m here for the evidentiary hearing?
On the Law & Order episode, I recommend they change the tattoo artist’s name to S. Fincter Brownei.
This could be a blessing in disguise. Much like the recent Star Wars, the film really suffered from an excessive focus on *ahem* Tatooin’.
… I’m at Jewish levels of self-loathing over here.
The corporate attorney held his breath and told himself to be patient. It was almost time to land the death blow, but the moment had to be PERFECT. He surveyed the faces of the jury and waited for that Brickhouse amateur to finish his questioning.
He was done, with no real damage done. Slowly, the soon-to-be victorious attorney rose from his seat and stalked ponderously toward the witness with an expressionless face, betraying nothing of the storm about to swamp the stand.
He spun and stared the jury in the eye in a sweep of confident countenance.
“Mr. Whitmill, please tell me over which eye you applied Mr. Tyson’s tattoo?”
“The right eye. I remember, because his head is always cocked to the right, and it felt like those scary chompers were leaning in to take a bite of me,” the ink artist said with a cautious laugh. The galley snickered its approval, remembering the Holyfield incident vividly.
“AHA!” thundered the corporate attorney. “And tell me where exactly is the tattoo located in this picture of Mr. Helms I have before you?”
Whitmill paused, unsure of the attorney’s angle. “The left?”
“THE LEFT? THE LEFT, ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Your honor, I move for an immediate dismissal of this case!!!!!”
In the back row of the galley, a lanky and bespectacled man in a jewfro that looked something like Donald Sutherland’s illegitimate child was smiling fiercely. He rose silently and turned to leave the courtroom, his unburdened mind shifting to happy thoughts about the gangbang he had heard about over near the college. He wasn’t 100% sure he had overheard the address correctly, but after today’s events, he was feeling a little lucky. A LOT lucky, in fact.
THE END
Ya know, if the movie had to digitally eliminate the tattoo but was full of dialogue about the tattoo that obviously isn’t there… that would be pretty classic.
S. Victor Whitmill will now be sued by the Maori People; and they will use the old laws to deal with their enemies.