The new extended trailer for Cowboys and Aliens premiered the other night on Spike TV’s Guy’s Choice Awards and I missed it, probably because I’d rather watch my grandma’s cakefarts video than regular Spike programming. But now it’s online, and you can watch it below without interruption of Kevin James promos.  Cowboys opens July 29th, and I’m still not sure what to make of it.  While it certainly sounds like Hollywood’s favorite action movie clichés decided to get together and play limp biscuit onto a script, as far as mash-ups of tropes go, I’ll take Cowboys‘ alien invasion, amnesia, rocket hands, and Indiana Jones over Super 8‘s sad kids with daddy issues in love any day (if I find out Daniel Craig keeps his dead wife’s picture in a locket I swear to God I’m walking out). What can I say, I do enjoy aliens and explosions and rocket hands and Olivia Wilde naked (PG-13 naked, of course).  As long as restraint is no object, some dinosaurs, the predator, and a vampire cyborg might’ve been nice. Come on, it’ll be like if Sucker Punch wasn’t secretly about child rape.

[screenjunkies]