The Alamo Drafthouse Theater in Austin has long been known as a mecca for savvy moviegoers (or hipsters, however you want to call it), and one thing savvy moviegoers (and Latvians) hate is people talking or texting during the movie. As per theater policy, a girl was recently kicked out of the Alamo without refund for texting after she’d already been warned twice (no word on what movie it was). On her way home, the girl left the theater an angry voicemail message, saying “I’ve texted in all the other theaters in Austin, and no one ever gave a f*ck.”
Alamo CEO Tim League correctly recognized this as perhaps the best free advertisement for his theater one could provide, and put it in the above video, which will now play at Alamo theaters as part of the “Don’t Talk or Text” PSA that runs before their movies.
“I will never be comin’ back to your ‘Alamo Drafthouse’ or whatever. I’d rather go to a reglear theater, where people are actually polite.”
Gotta love a gal who fails to recognize the irony of that statement. I’d love to hear her take on Paul Revere’s historic ride. Anyway, this probably won’t be nearly as funny once we find out she has four kids, all named “Jaxxon.”
STOP TEXTING, TERRIER! BAD DOG! NO REFUND!
[AlamoDrafthouse, Picture source]
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I fucking hate those dark theaters. It makes it impossible to see the movie.
TURN THE FUCKING LIGHTS UP, CHEAPSKATES!
I heard that the black moviegoers around her complained.
“That white girl was using her phone so much, I could barely hear myself yelling at the screen!”
Drawing and quartering is too good for her! Thank god she is telling her other “friends” to never darken AD’s doorstep again.
Why give her a refund when she clearly wasn’t watching the movie anyway?
I’ll never rock my one leg at your shitty movie whatever again, Alamo Drafthouse!
Clearly she was there to see Tree of Life.
That was totally inconsiderate of the Alamo Drafthouse to not turn on the lights and pause the movie while she went to the bathroom to do coke.
Texans are surprisingly patriotic considering they can’t pronounce the name of their country correctly.
The Alamo Drafthouse Theater in Austin
I don’t mean to say that I know more about the state of Texas than the people who live there, but I’m pretty sure the Alamo is in San Antonio, not Austin.
I was at a movie last weekend where the 3 people directly in front of me kept texting -to one another -the whole. Fucking. Time. I wondered if they were even watching the movie at all. I got my answer when the end credits began and these three fuckers were the only people in the theater to stand up and clap for Pirates of the Caribbean. True story and fuck you in advance.
She made that phone call while she was driving, right?
In my defense, how the fuck else am I supposed to text a picture of my dick without using the flash? This piece of shit iphone doesn’t even have night vision.
I’d say to chain her up in the basement, but there’s no basement at The Alamo Drafthouse!
Chino I’m sure she made it while attending her next movie.
Another example of why the Drafthouse is the best theater on earth
Of course being from Texas this texter was booted. Damn cowboy culture.
The first movie theater near me that puts up cell phone signal blocking curtains, paint, etc, in the theater gets 100% of my movie-going business from that point forward. I remember reading about an independently owned theater in Utah (I think) that did something like this. I’d honestly pay $1 or $2 more per ticket for this convenience. And I don’t want to hear any shit about emergencies or needing to stay in contact with your precious kids or any of that…emergencies happened before the cell phone explosion in the 90s and yet somehow we all managed.
Having taken umbrage at the Alamo’s slight I hear she intends to sue and, in one of those “so crazy it just might work” manoeuvres, has hired Ozzy Osbourne as her lawyer.
The nearest I can get to a Santa Anna gag is in having Santa Anna be the patron saint of annoying cinemagoers.
She didn’t need to use her phone as a flashlight. The aisles at night, are big and bright.
*clap, clap, clap, clap*
CB, those who fail to learn from her story are doomed to retweet it.
If she was in Austin, chances are she’s not from Texas.
lolz! t3xtdawg tinks hes pepol!
There was a second texter on the hairy knoll.
I cant say I’m surprised. This type of movie the-a-ter facism happens everyday in the Magnited States of America.
When I am dictator of the world, the first offense punishment for texting in a movie will be reading a Harry Knowles movie review. The second offense punishment will be reading the talkback in a Harry Knowles movie review. Third offense, a threesome with Harry Knowles and that Asian chick who has sex with him for some godawful reason.
I can’t think of a better place to sext than while at a screening of Melancholia. It’s deep. *wink wink
swizzle23, sadly theaters are no longer aloud to do this. According to FCC regulation, it is now illegal for a private company to block cell phone signals.
I guess getting your angry complaint used as advertising that cunts like you don’t frequent that establishment should be called getting Alamo’ed.
Mmmm, Cunt a la Mode.
Chino, I think chaining her to the ceiling in the lobby with a cellphone that is permanently taking calls taped into her mouth would probably send a more effective and affective message than chaining her up in the basement.
Though perhaps her desperate, animalistic howls for bread and water in the night would be enough.
Any Candlebox track woulda worked there.
Jacktion!, Alamo Drafthouse originated in Austin, but has a few locations in SA and Houston.
Cinnabon, are you some sort of Nazi lover?
I got jack booted out of the theater : (
Considering this went down in Texas, she’s lucky she didn’t get the chair.
Considering she was communing with the unseen in a dark room in Texas, she’s damn lucky they didn’t just think she was a witch and burn her at the stake.
This is the Michigan version of Andy Rooney, complaining about modern day movie theaters.
[blog.mlive.com]
“I’d love to hear her take on Paul Revere’s historic ride.”
Palin was right about Revere. Look into it. Even Leftist history professors had to suck it up and admit it.
The great thing about Sarah Palin is that her sentences are so convoluted and obtuse that you could make a case for them meaning almost anything.