The Muppets opens in November, and stars Jason Segel, Amy Adams, Chris Cooper, plus rumored cameos from pretty much every actor you’ve ever heard of, with James Bobin directing a script by Jason Segel and Forgetting Sarah Marshall director Nick Stoller. And now there’s a trailer, yay!
On vacation in Los Angeles, Walter, the world’s biggest Muppet fan, and his friends Gary (Jason Segel) and Mary (Amy Adams) from Smalltown, USA, discover the nefarious plan of oilman Tex Richman (Chris Cooper) to raze the Muppet Theater and drill for the oil recently discovered beneath the Muppets’ former stomping grounds. To stage The Greatest Muppet Telethon Ever and raise the $10 million needed to save the theater, Walter, Mary and Gary help Kermit reunite the Muppets, who have all gone their separate ways: Fozzie now performs with a Reno casino tribute band called the Moopets, Miss Piggy is a plus-size fashion editor at Vogue Paris, Animal is in a Santa Barbara clinic for anger management, and Gonzo is a high-powered plumbing magnate.
I could try to put my reaction to this teaser into words, but I think Tom Brady on a waterslide sums it up nicely:
Incidentally, they might want to change that tagline. “Muppet Domination” sounds a little too much like a fetish.
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“Whoa whoa whoa are there muppets in this movie?” – Porn parody I hope someone is shooting NOW.
God I hate being a Patriots fan. I would trade all of the Super Bowls for a QB who wasn’t an IRL internet troll or a coach who wasn’t an IRL, bridge-based, child-eating troll.
God what I wouldn’t do to get elbow deep in that sweet little redhead and make that bitch sing…
…I mean, unless Elmo isn’t in the movie, in which case I’d like to fingerbang Amy Adams.
Animal went to a clinic because his wife taped a phone conversation with him were he said “Come crawling faster, Obey your Master, Your life burns faster, Obey your Master, or you´ll be raped by a pack of feebles”
Now all I can think of is Arnold chasing a fat latina maid around his mansion yelling “WOMAN! WOOMAN!”
If in the first ten minutes there’s not a scene of a glowing Walter doing cartwheels in the aisle of a Baptist church yelling, “The hand, Gary, the hand!” then I’m walking out.
[With a lifeless Kermit somehow dangling from his pelvis, Crappy approaches and speaks]
If you want to cure yourself of those urges, inkyPee, just take a look at Amy’s IMdb page picture.
Srsly, WTF?
I’d be really excited on a water slide as well if I kept forgetting to bring a scrunchie with me to Six Flags
Tawmmy Brady sez Sodomy or GTFO!
Come on, click that sodomy link at work. CLICK IT!
Yay, Kermit Bale! Best meme ever.
Amy Adams devolves into Amy Ryan then into Amy something else and then finally into Amy Madigan. It will unfortunately be televised.
Tom Brady is a saint! Way to blaspheme Vince.
Stadler: This movie is gonna be a stinky piece of pig-shit
Waldorf: You mean it’s gonna be Kermit’s wang?
Both: DO-HOHOHOHO!
Steve Martin in short shorts asking me to smell the bottlecap or GTFO!
Stadler: Did you hear they discovered oil beneath our former stomping grounds?
Waldorf: What, Raquel’s leaking again?
yo dawg, my boyz were watchin this and were all like “yo, dis shit is wack” and then that big ass porker came on and we started doin four loki shots.
we got pig rolled, yo
True story: I knew my wife was the one when she whispered “motorcycle cop” in my ear.
Beeker’s gonna have some ‘splainin’ to do when they discover his meth lab in the basement.
Miss Piggy is a magazine editor? I’ve heard of porking your way to the top, but this is ridiculous.
There is nothing I hate more than the Muppets. No anal warts, not genocide, not waxing my taint, not the thought that Bristol Palin has more money than I ever will.
Wait. Jason Segel. I hate that fucker even more than the Muppets.
Well, MrTwister, there’s a special level of hell Dante forgot to mention what you’ll be calling home soon, so you best get used to the fire and brimstone.