After UFC light heavyweight Lyoto Machida publicly thanked Steven Seagal for helping teach him the crane kick that knocked out Randy Couture, we assumed Seagal was some kind of kindly-old Mr. Miyagi character, who probably had Machida-kun running around his apartment kicking dust mites off his nunchuk trophies or ironing his caftans, as a folksy method of drilling proper technique.  But now that this video of Seagal training with Machida has emerged (watch it after the jump), his coaching style strangely seems to be more John Kreese than Mr. Miyagi.

The video is only about a minute long and definitely worth a watch.  After demonstrating a wildly spazzy-looking, hands-down charging front kick, the doughy Seagal, who, like every baseball or football coach I’ve ever had, demonstrates that physical fitness is not a prerequisite for coaching athletes, can be heard telling Machida:

“Use your mind. Use your mind! I don’t care if you kill him. I don’t care. You f*ck him up. You take him out.”

THAT’S TELEKINESIS, KYLE.  Whether Seagal means Machida should kill Couture later in the fight or Machida’s training partner who’s actually standing in front of him at the time, it’s hard to say.  It could just be something Steven Seagal doesn’t keep track of, like space and time, or caloric intake.

It also sounds strange coming from a famous practitioner of aikido…

Aikido (合気道 aikidō?) is a Japanese martial art developed by Morihei Ueshiba as a synthesis of his martial studies, philosophy, and religious beliefs. Aikido is often translated as “the Way of unifying (with) life energy” or as “the Way of harmonious spirit.” Ueshiba’s goal was to create an art that practitioners could use to defend themselves while also protecting their attacker from injury. [Wikipedia]

This “kill him with your mind!” move must be something Seagal developed on his own.  Perhaps while trying to find out why Richie did Bobby Lupo.

[video via Tatame]