When Oliver and I come up with an idea for a supercut (like his drag quiz from this morning), it’s usually something we discuss over moonshine while we shoot squirrels off our yard car. Nerve on the other hand, recently put together this ode to pretty women falling down, and apparently based it on a quote from the New Yorker. Well la di dah, Professor Cityboy. Around here, that’s the kinda fancy falutin’ that’ll get you pecker-whacked with squirrel bats. (*spits dip into Gatorade bottle, leans back against truck hitch*)
“‘To make a woman adorable,’ one female sucessful screenwriter says, ‘you have to defeat her at the beginning… It’s as simple as making the girl cry, fifteen minutes into the movie.’ Relatability is based on vulnerability, which creates likeability. With male characters, smoking pot, getting drunk, and lying around watching porn is likeable; with females, the same conduct is hateful. So funny women must not only be gorgeous; they must fall down and then sob, knowing it’s all their fault.” — Tad Friend in The New Yorker, April 11, 2011
It looks like Cameron Diaz smokes pot and gets drunk plenty in Bad Teacher, but I suppose that’s not out yet. Anyway, cool supercut. Though I would’ve called it “Bitches Be Trippin’, Yo.”
[Nerve]
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Well, how else are we supposed to know they’re SO SASSY?
Bitches Be Trippin, YO is the name of Chodin’s written reply to the subpoena served to him for a domestic battery charge.
If they really wanted to relate to the type of women that pay to see Rom Coms they would replace ‘falling down’ with ‘blowing some dude they thought had money’.
Cameron Diaz? So he meant ugly women falling down? Either way, haha fuck you chicks.
I get drunk AND I fall down. Please like me.
I’m dumb.
Because if a pretty woman doesn’t have easily identifiable flaws, fuck that bitch.
Really, I want to know who decided that falling down a lot is relatable. Do we all have inner ear problems and weak ankles?
Some women age like a fine wine. Cameron Diaz has aged like bathtub gin.
Tyler Perry thinks that to make women relatable, he just needs four of them – each one a complete stereotype.
I had a joke all lined up after watching that trailer about shitstains, and what Justin Timberlake would think about a woman who looked like Cameron Diaz…and then I realized they actually dated.
Yeah, you will never convince me, regardless of how many funny skits he is in on SNL, or how many “hot tracks” he makes, that the guy wasn’t fondled by his old manager in N’Sync.
Justin Timberlake was not fondled by his old manager, he was only slightly diddled.
I always feel so old when I tell people I remember when Cameron Diaz was hot.
“So funny women must not only be gorgeous; they must fall down and then sob, knowing it’s all their fault, and mention that they love Star Wars to increase their geek creed”
FTFY
Add sobbing, Chino, and you’ll be a star.
they must fall down and then sob, knowing it’s all their fault.
Nothing turns me on like a sobbing, groveling woman begging for punishment… save tits.
Shiiiet, Sandra Bullock looks like she’s waiting to hop on the bukkake tour.
I shall oblige!
I’mma tell my pregnant girlfriend that if she wants to be adorable, she damn well better fall down the stairs.