"'Dicknose.'"

Big week last week.  Macho Man got raptured early, a monkey stole the show at the Hangover 2 premiere, a Burt Reynolds fan introduced us to the term “womb broom,” and Schwarzenegger had to quit movies to focus on his illegitimate children…  As always, the Filmdrunk comments section was able to capitalize on this wealth of material far better than I.  I was sitting here looking for a way not to name Chino the winner for the second week in a row, but why fight it?  She deserved it.

 

[From Crystal the Monkey steals Hangover 2 premiere] Chino Moreno says: Dolce & Banana

[From Burt Reynolds fan letters from the 70s are terrifying] Chino Moreno says: Listen, I don’t care how you sling it around, just don’t get it in my hair.

[From Macho Men don't die, they just get raptured early] Chino Moreno says: Hmmm…where was Nick Hogan at 10 am?

(*slow clap*)

HONORABLE MENTION

[From Macho Men don't die, they just get raptured early]

Stinky Peet says: Next time, snap into a slim limb.

The Reverend Skeleton says: He’s probably faking it.

Scrote Pilgrim says: I banged a chick against a tree on a beach once. She certainly got a Sandy Ravage.

[From Lars Von Trier calls himself a Nazi]

Monks says: What did Kirsten Dunst whisper in his ear?  “I’m so wet right now.”

JessicaD says: I thought everyone knew the Von Trapp family were Nazi’s? “Good Night, Farewell, auf Wiedersehen, Sieg Heil…”

[From Burt Reynolds fan letters from the 70s are terrifying]

The Hammer says: Man the 70s was truly the golden age of Mustache Rides.

[From the first trailer for Paul Blart: Zookeeper is our new cultural high-water mark]

Stinky Peet says: That trailer makes me want to take up SCUBA diving and apologize to Osama bin Laden.

[From Trying to think up lines for the Anchorman porn parody]

Patty Boots says: MI GATO. MI GATO ES EN FUEGO.

Biggus Rickus says: So they’re doing a porn parody of a news parody. When they make “This Ain’t Scary Movie”, a parody of “Scream” which was itself a parody of a slasher movie, we’ll all be sucked into a parallel dimension where the non-goateed are goateed and vice versa.

And finally, from James Franco carves ‘Brad Renfro’ into his arm (not that this needs any context):

FalseRumorsDotCom says: Also, Jonathan Brandis looked hot as a girl in “Ladybugs.”

That comment might not have been the funniest of the week, but it was probably the most representative of the discourse.  There’s no admission too shameful around here.  (He did look hot, didn’t he).

Until next week, Drunkards.