If Pixar is the standard by which we inevitably, unfairly measure all other cartoons, Cars is the franchise that proves they’re still human. Though you’d think one of them would’ve been enough. You’re not perfect, we get it.
[Official synopsis] Star racecar Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson) and the incomparable tow truck Mater (Larry the Cable Guy) take their friendship to exciting new places in Cars 2 when they head overseas to compete in the first-ever World Grand Prix to determine the world’s fastest car. But the road to the championship is filled with plenty of potholes, detours and hilarious surprises when Mater gets caught up in an intriguing adventure of his own: international espionage. Torn between assisting Lightning McQueen in the high-profile race and towing the line in a top-secret spy mission, Mater’s action-packed journey leads him on an explosive chase through the streets of Japan and Europe, trailed by his friends and watched by the whole world.
So… Delta Farce with cars, basically? From the company that brought you a group of friends holding hands as they inch toward the incinerator, comes Larry the Cable Guy as a buck-toothed tow truck getting a bidet. Whatever, man.
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Michael Caine!
Did they land Kevin James for the Winnebago that has a faulty exhaust system? DUH! WINNEBAGOING!
Hey, does anyone know what to do if your heroin arm is cold and you need a scarf, too?
Eib-nice.
Did they land Charlie Sheen for the PT Cruiser?
…
FUCK YOU, STONEY GETS IT!
Owen Wilson and Larry the Cable Guy take their friendship to exciting new places? Dor sho gha!
*orders tickets online*
Fek, does that mean they do each other in the exhaust hole?
Seriously, Disney channel shows crappy Mater short cartoons all the time. They are milking it.
As long as John Ratsenb- John Ratzennbe- John Rattsunb–
As long as Cliff Clavin keeps getting a paycheck I’m happy.
Eib-tailpipe to tailpipe…not something children should see…
bows to Fek
No wonder Owen Wilson tried to kill himself.
Owen Wilson’s character is special in that he needs a jump start every few minutes (and I ain’t talking with jumper cables!)
take their friendship to exciting new places – sounds like someone is missing the chrome off their trailer hitch.
As an auto enthusiast, practically nothing annoys me more than anthropomorphic cars. I can barely tolerate Hot Wheels ‘fantasy’ style cars not based in reality. I’m doing my best to keep my son ‘pure’ in terms of his appreciate for cars.
Although he has several ‘Cars’ toys, he will often repeat my condescending question when talking about them – “Do cars have eyes? NOOOOOOO!”
Cars is actually the only pixar movie I cried at…. not cause of emotion or anything, I could have used the ticket money for something good and it made me weep.
The Cars franchise is supposed to appeal to the 8yr old inside of all of us, where I’m more concerned with appealing to 8yr olds I want to be inside of.
* puts on Lightning McQueen cap, grabs bucket of blue paint *
The inevitable porn parody “2 Cars, 1 Cup Holder” will surely be a gas!
Star racecar Lightning McQueen and the incomparable tow truck Mater take their friendship to exciting new places in Cars 2 when they spray washer fluid all over a Prius’ windshield.
I wonder if the front end of Lightning McQueen is going to be deformed?
Their tailpipes are going to be all blurred out right?
(A, uhh, friend of mine told me that was a topical joke for some reason that I don’t understand.)
You will get very sad if you click on the “Larry The Cable Guy” tag.
And then they inhale the exhaust! Bishop, are you watching this?!
This all sounds like Pixar’s just easing us into their obvious set-up for “Cars 3D: 2 Fast 2 Bi-Curious”