"I left that pie to cool right here and now it's gone. Anyone seen Kilmer?"
That 80s buddy cop flick genius Shane Black was one of the candidates being looked at as a replacement for Jon Favreau just seemed like one of those stories movie nerds get super excited over and then never hear about again. But it sounds like it’s actually happening. I’m so excited I didn’t even bother to suck the Cheetos crumbs off my fingers before I typed this.
The ever secretive Marvel Studios is in final negotiations with Shane Black to direct Iron Man 3 set to be released on May 3, 2013. As you know , IM1 and IM2 director Jon Favreau begged off to helm Magic Kingdom at Disney [puke] so his relationship with the franchise ran its course. Shane is first and foremost a writer but it’s not clear whether he’ll be penning the IM3 script as well. “That’s not figured out,” our source says. Of course, everyone in and around Marvel is keeping mum. [Deadline]
I can’t blame anyone for being excited about this. I still remember one of my favorite Shane Black exchanges, from Long Kiss Goodnight:
Geena Davis: Same principle as deflowering virgins. I read it in this Harold Robbins book. A guy bites her on the ear, distracts from the pain. You ever try that?
Samuel L. Jackson: No. I usually sock ‘em in the jaw and yell ‘Pop goes the weasel.’
But as much as I love Shane Black, I can’t be too excited. Marvel is still the company rushes movies into production and is rumored to push hard to cross-promote their other movies, two things that seem like they’d clash hard with a guy who’s particular about his scripts. At this point in the franchise, Shane Black directing an Iron Man movie is kind of like watching Clive Owen bang an aging cocktail waitress. I’d explain that further, but I think the analogy speaks for itself.
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I’m really looking forward to Marvel’s “What If: A Sequel Is Good?”
Yeah, but let’s not forget the whole “the kind that shreds” exchange from Last Boy Scout.
I guess what I’m saying is why the f*ck did I actually think that was a good movie when I was 15?
Jon Favreau begged off to helm Magic Kingdom at Disney
Begging off is when you jerk it to a loop of Oliver Twist asking for more.
Erswi, it’s a great movie if you imagine the player getting shot in the beginning is Marshawn Lynch.
So by that waitress banging analogy, I assume you mean watching Shane Black direct Iron Man will somehow help convince me that Clive Owen’s wife isn’t some kind of long-con beard?
This is good news, Downey and black go well together, as proven in ‘Tropic Thunder’.
Should title it ‘The Iron Man’ and make it a one off just to piss on Aronofsky’s ‘The Wolverine’.
There is nearly nothing more painful to me than the thought of Geena Davis talking about deflowering virgins. Her penis is just so large and veiny. Only the Japanese can accurately write a description of what that does to the girls she attacks with her monster hands.
Geena Davis must be stopped.
I hear they’re going to cast Val Kilmer as the politically correct version of the Mandarin called the Margarine
Erswi, it’s a great movie if you imagine the player getting shot in the beginning is Marshawn Lynch.
Coulda swore it was Steve McNair…
Besides, Marshawn Lynch is cool! He had that great run in the playoffs where he beat down on all of those Sai…oooooohhhhh, right…fucking guy is a baktag!
Shane Black should revitalize other franchises. Imagine how awesome SISTER ACT 3: NUN OF YOUR BUSINESS could be.