
THERE CAN BE ONLY THREE!
Back in 2008, Summit Entertainment picked up the rights to The Highlander with Iron Man writers Art Marcum and Matt Holloway on board to reboot the franchise. They later dropped out and Summit announced last year that the original film’s producer, Neal Moritz, signed on with director Justin Lin, who is best known for directing three of the Fast and Furious films, but he gets a pass because he directed the “Modern Warfare” episode of Community, too.
Now Summit is moving forward with the new version, with longtime Highlander producer Peter Davis also jumping in. And the team has its collective eyes set on a writer now, too – Melissa Rosenberg, who wrote all five Twilight films. Nerd boner now flaccid.
So what about this project is going to sparkle, Variety?
Summit plans to expand on the original “Highlander” premise of immortals hunting each other through the ages. The new pic will center on the immortal Scottish swordsman Connor MacLeod, who must confront a murderous barbarian — the last of his kind — who lusts for a fabled prize.
Of course Twilight author Stephanie Meyer is responsible for most of the Twilight aspects that we poke fun of, like sparkling vampires and middle-aged women lusting over teenage boys. But I’m curious to see if Rosenberg can capture the true evil and maliciousness of a character like the Kurgan, having written lines like these for a movie about vampires:
“I hate you for making me want you so much.”
“I can’t ever lose control with you.”
“You’re like my own personal brand of heroin.”
I can see it now…
Connor MacLeod raises his broadsword as the Kurgan kneels before him, defeated and grasping for his last few breaths.
MacLeod: “There can be only one!”
Kurgan: “You may remove my head, but you already shattered my heart.”




There should have been…only one.
I think it’s clear that Adrian Paul split into Colin Farrell and Joseph Fiennes.
Listen, baktags, we all know this is gonna suck. Just use FRAPS and record a World of Warcraft PVP server for a couple hours, call it Highlander, and increase you profits by a trillion percent. It won’t make people like Him hate it MORE, and the mindless masses won’t know the difference.
I saw your highlander movie…it was shit!
The Mighty Feklahr redacts that. If they get the REAL Kurgan (Filmdrunks very own) and he goes around killing people with a sword and banging retards…SIGN HIM UP! Qaplah!
I’m looking forward to the part of the movie where Connor MacLeod kills Harold, buries him in the back yard and steals his girlfriend.
I AM IMMORTAL, I HAVE INSIDE ME BLOOD OF KINGS..
wait, whats that? new lyrics? right then.
I AM IMMORTAL, I HAVE TEENAGE ANGST AND SPARKLING SKIN…
what now? Oh, I died of AIDS related pneumonia in 1991? Shit. Well at least I’m not around to see this faggy highlander remake.
-Freddy Mercury
These days, if you go around shouting “Ramierez!”, your lawn will look great.
Keanu Reeves as the Spaniard or GTFO.
Yeah, I don’t think she can:
[media.gunaxin.com]
There can only be one receding hairline!
“Modern Warfare” is one of the greatest half hours in the history of television.
Not coincidentally, my love of shirtless Jeff Winger rivals my love of shirtless Ryan Reynolds.
I like Fek’s idea where the Kurgan goes around banging people with a sword and killing retards.
*re-reads previous post*
Whatever, either one sounds better than Twilight.
“You can do that to me anytime m’lord” to a guy is the equivalent to “your butt looks great in those jeans” to a girl. Highlander has taught me so much.
How can they possibly top the first one? I mean it did win the Academy Award for The Greatest Movie of All Time!
I hope with the new movie they can find someone who does an authentic Scottish accent like Switzerland’s own Christoper Lambert.
Voiceover Guy: He said, “There can be only one.” HE LIED.
*Bagpipes sound, Mars Bars get fried, Buckfast gets swallied….
*Taylor Lautner reads Burnsy’s article, takes off his shirt and runs to see his agent*
Lautner:”What is Scot Land? I need to know for a role I wanna play.”
Agent: “You mean Scotland. It’s a country.”
Lautner: …
Agent: “I’ll explain it later. Listen, Summitt just called and offered you 11 million dollars to play the lead in Highlander.”
Lautner: …
Agent: “That’s probably the role you came to see me about.”
Lautner: “Alright! Wait, I can’t speak that language.”
Agent: “You’ll be fine. Now get out of my office.”
(*Lautner puts on shirt, strips it off, sprints back to his house and WHAM!…runs face first into his sliding glass door.*)
i wonder if premarital abstinence will play a role.
*channels inner black belt teenage werewolf*
LOL, Moose, it’s not like they would let Kellan Putz have a lead, that dork likes watching tennis. GIRLS tennis.
Hey MacLeod, get off of my ewe!
Haha, my dad loves that joke
Mel Gibson in a dual role as both the Highlander and the Kurgan, or GTFO.
Thomas Jane as The Highlander