The trailer for Martin Campbell’s Green Lantern has leaked a little early, but that’s nothing to hold against it. What are you, my girlfriend? Anyway, it starts out with Ryan Reynolds playing Hal Jordan, just your average Joe. You know the type: hot-shot, womanizing ne’er-do-well fighter pilot with a suspiciously-hot female superior who’s always telling him to get it together. If you’ve met one, you’ve met them all. He may be a litte rough around the edges, but he’s gotta look good if he’s ever going to get a space alien to put a ring on it, so he takes his shirt off a lot.
Then one day, wouldn’t you know it, a cheesy-ass looking alien comes down from heaven to tell him spandex is in again, and Hal Jordan becomes THE Green Lantern. And you know what that means. That’s right, now he has the power to, uh… drive his Jeep fast. And… get beat up. And, uh, “create stuff he sees in his mind.” (I don’t know either, dude). Then Peter Sarsgaard shows up with a huge-ass forehead. But a couple cuts later, wouldn’t you know it, Peter Saaaarsgaaaard’s forehead is EVEN BIGGER. Did I say a villain with a giant forehead? I did indeed. Oh I know, I was as surprised as you are. Luckily Ryan Reynolds won’t be fighting him alone, because now he has his ring, his skin-tight suit, and his magical crotch bulge. I’m sure he’ll save the day, but will he conquer his fear and win the heart of his love in the process??? I sure hope so. He’s such a sweet boy.

[via ComicBookMovie]




Linterna verde. Sounds delicious!
Looks as goofy as Yogi Bear.
hahahaha holy shit… peter sarsgaard
Vince is the Arch Duke of the Screen Cap
Wait, there was something other than Ryan Reynolds in his underwear in that trailer? Because I can’t get past Ryan Reynolds in his underwear.
So I’m assuming Peter Sarsgaard is playing one of DC’s most feared villains, The Testicle?
Blake Lively looks anything but.
Seriously, was Paris Hilton unable to step away from blowing a football team for a scenes?
In tenuously-related news, I call my Fleshlight my Jack-O-Lantern.
If he goes out dressed like that, he’s gonna get raped by a pack of Guardians.
Wait, Blake Lively’s a pilot? I’d like her to enter my cockpit. ZING! POW! etc.
Don’t you hate it when you think you’ve thought up the wittiest sex toy/vegetable crossover pun EVER, so you post it up and THEN you Google it to verify your own oh-so-original genius?
I fucking hate that.
Peter Sarsgaard must be playing a young John Carpenter.
SARSguard’s forehead just got cast as the background for a Mac vs. PC commercial.
SARSguard (catchy, right) needs a size 9 3/4 screen cap. For his head is large, you see.
At the premiere they will project the movie onto Sarsgaard’s iveneverseenanythingthatbigbeforehead.
“Anything I can see in my mind, I can create.”
Blake Lively Naked.
Blake Lively Naked.
Blake Lively Naked.
[dismissive wanking w/ cockring motion]
[s32.photobucket.com]
First, the Mexicans take away our jobs! Then, they take away our… uh… subtitles.
And, WTF? I thought Seth Rogen was the Green Lantern! Did they recast or something?
So wait, was this the Top Gun remake they were talking about?
Rogen is the Green Hornet. This and Prince Valiant look kind of like poop. I am disappoint.
But yeah, shirtless Reynolds please.
Yes that is an impressive forehead, but until Peter Sarsgaard slips into a bear suit and shoots a ten-year-old in the chest, he’ll only be the second most impressive forehead in Hollywood.
Ryan Reynolds derp da derp. This looks like the derpiest superhero film that ever derped da derp.
I actually changed my avatar because I was going to Photoshop Ryan Reynolds’ face over Jeff Winger’s. But then I remembered that I don’t have Photoshop on my laptop.
Also, it’s kind of creepy.
I don’t see what the fuss over abs is all about. I’ve been told that having one giant ab is pretty sexy too.*
*Thanks Father Delaney! *wink*
Is that Alien here to bring us tossed salad and scrambled eggs?!?