Blizzard Entertainment held a convention celebrating their Warcraft, Starcraft, and Diablo games over the weekend, and in the course of the event, a great leader arose from the hordes and distinguished himself as the new nerd king. The video is below, but here is the full text of his question, an achievement on par with removing an enchanted sword from a block of obsidian:
Red Shirt Guy: “Hello. I just finished reading “The Shattering” yesterday, and I noticed something. It said that Falstad Wildhammer was going to be on the Council of Three Hammers, but in the beta, it’s Kurdrin Wildhammer, and Falstad is not in the game at all. What happened to him?”
Guys at the podium: “Isn’t Falstad dead? From… Day of the Dragon?”
Red Shirt Guy: “No. He survived, and in fact, he was the leader of Aerie Peak and Vanilla Wow through Wrath of the Lich King.”
Guys at the podium: (humbled) “…Thanks for pointing that out. We’re going to get that fixed.”
(*the crowd goes wild, He has risen*)
That. Was. Incredible.
Frankly, I’m a little annoyed by the lack of fanfare. You should know when you’ve been bested, Warcraft designer guys. One of you should be presenting Red Shirt Guy on a podium before his new subjects while the other anoints his forehead with oil.
[hat tip: Buzzfeed]
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His forehead’s already been anointed with grease. No oil necessary.
Isn’t this more of a Pajiba story?
Then he turned water into Cherry Coke and made it rain Cool Ranch Doritos.
See??? Lince does it every time!!!
Zero-that was pretty tight.
Asperger’s has never been so sexy.
[USMC pulls Crappy out of Sadam's spider hole]
‘Bout time, squid freight! I miss anything?
Vanilla Wow is the worst Nantucket Shore star. Just.the.worst
Fek, gaming in the 1990′s was a hell of a thing.
The only thing nerdier than this? A well defined and accurate D&D roleplay session with a “legitimate” vampyre posted on a film blog for lols.
(Is HTML turned off?)
Those Wizzard dweebs blew the easy out. Red shirt? Duh, just shoot that Jolt sucking twerp and move on.
He’ll not be missed.
“On the Itchy and Scratchy CD Rom, is there a way to get out of the Dungeon without using the Wizard Key?”
Are we supposed to believe this is some sort of magic xylophone or something? Boy, I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder.
Cintus suprimus!
To us he may be Baron Von Goolo, but to Red Shirt Guy he’ll always be “Dad.”
He’s going to be rolling in pussy that was recently rolled through flour for that one.
Bruce Leroy Jenkins is “Chocolate Wow”!
Donk-they roll anime fleshlights in flour?
In Vanilla Wow, it’s ok to pwn slaves.
It’s good to see that caricatures actually exist and aren’t just creations of failed art students in malls and sidewalks.
In conclusion, many Shubs and Zulls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Sloar that day, I can tell you.
I miss Crystal Pepsi.
That’s all.
Fuck me, the dialect he uses in this is harder to crack than the fucking Navajo code used in dubya dubya two.
Please let Nic Cage die trying to protect him in some awesome movie in the future. Windtalkers 2: Falstad Wildhammer’s Revenge! It would explode the internet and the universe.
Nice to see Thomas F. Wilson back in the spotlight.
Fek, shit, I meant corn
chipsstarch.I wore a purple shirt and even I want to kick this kid’s ass – some jerk who actually wore a purple shirt.
I bet his parents are proud.
Crapbasket-What civilly unioned mothers wouldn’t be?
Mom: Oh Jonny dear, I saw your video,you really…pwned?… those… toobz? I’ll make you an extra grilled cheese for dinner!
Red Shirt: FIGHT TWO DEMONS!!!!!!
That extra year of sports eligibility at college is going to come in really handy for this asshole.
Abed thinks this guy needs to relax a little.
Oooooh snap!
What this dude did to Blizzard is the nerd equivalent of making love to your mother’s anus in front of you.
This kid ate a few too many snack bags of Vanilla Wow and got an epic case of the Olestra anal leakage.
“Thank you for this opportunity to speak. First I’d like to introduce myself, I represent the Cholesterol is Too Damn High Party..”
only thing better than this video are the youtube comments:
#
nirvgorilla
1 hour ago
@Westonci By the way, faggot, why are you calling him a virgin as if that matters? You know who else was a virgin? ISAAC NEWTON.
Ok, confession time: I’m a nerd. This is the second year that I’ve purchased the Blizzcon PPV (so much better than going), and that video is only the second funniest moment of the event.
[youtu.be]
Yep, it’s a nerdy fat kid tearing his knee ligament on stage while attempting the male undead dance.
You misshsphelled ligamenthsshhhsss.
Oh man. Just when this thread couldn’t get more nerdy! The geekometer tells me the pressure is too great. Exit too quickly and you’ll get a case of teh_dW33bz!!!111
lol @Monks for that video. This post just keeps getting better and better.
Glad to know that Jay Mohr was there to comfort him in his time of need.
and to continue the awesome references from The Simpsons…
“Ouch, my bones are so brittle! but i always drink plenty of… Malk?”
[1.bp.blogspot.com]
Damn… mofos wanna get those free t-shirts with these comments.
@Monks
Some gym teacher forgot to teach the nerds to stretch before forcing them to be pelted with dodgeballs.
We are not worthy to scratch his hard-to-reach places!
Sadly, this isn’t the first time the WOW lore has contradicted itself. I’d look it up, but I don’t care enough to remember the other instance…
Hey, that dork is wearing a red shirt! Shouldn’t he be dead by the end of the video!?
This confusion doesn’t happen in Hello Kitty Island Adventure
Motherfucker had a point.
Farva? Are we sure this isn’t some shitty Broken Lizard spoof?