When Stallone met Twitter part 2
09.03.10
Dammit, Sly! What’s with all the starf*ckery? Who is this impostor desperate for attention from D-list celebutards like Kim Kardashian? What happened to that existential buffoon we came to know and love? “And then I realized, it wasn’t a bag I was punching, but the fear of my own mortality…”
…Okay, better. Closer. Warmer…
…AAAAND WE’RE BACK! Oh thank God. This is the greatest thing to happen to the internet since amputee porn.
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Those dogs…they eat things that would make a billy goat puke. So yeah, I guess either they are human or Rambo was a Doberman.
You ever stare into your dogs balloon knot and wonder why theres a person inside it? no? yeah me neither…
“You ever look into your pet’s eyes and think there’s a person hiding inside”
Oh fuck, his dogs got into his roid stash again, and ate one of the kitchen staff.
keep punching ryan, sly.
great job!
KEEP PUNCHING, RYAN! THANKS…
With one fewer comma this would have been the perfect Seacrest-related Tweet.
$20 says he actually think it’s called Tritter.
“Tritter is 140 characters; I’ve played 56. Tritter is twice the actor I’ll ever be.”
More frightening even than Stallone’s face is the fact that I know *exactly* what he means about pets.
Not gonna happen, I’ve given up this week.
So even Stallone’s on the Twitter now. Have you seen this? Have you guys seen this?
I’m sorry but this all just seems a bit…Over The Top. HARFHARHARFHARF
Now here’s Sevendust with “My Immortalness”
You know it’s him because his account is veinified.
*bow tie spins, Stallone hangs from leg*
Ay ya kno I was just watchin dis documenterry about King Kong da uder day and dat magician was right it really was beeuty dat killed da beast.
Ok, since you all practically begged Him…
In individuals, insanity is rare; but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it BLEW MY FAHKIN’ MIND!
THE EXISTENTIAL BUFFOON STRIKES AGAIN!
Did someone mention amputee porn? I’m feeling a little misled here . . .
“you ever look into your pet’s eyes and think there’s a person hiding inside?”
“I’m not talkin like a person, person. I’m no dummy, you know, I mean, a person would never fit inside my dog. I jus mean, like, he got feelins an stuff.”
You ever look into your pet’s eyes when he’s lapping PB off your scrote and think “He’s getting fed, and I’m getting head.”
You all are reading these in a Rocky 1 voice too, right?
“The search of happiness is eveyone’s life’s story. The search for a fresh vein is MY life’s story.”
I was doing mine in his Party at Kitty and Stud’s voice.
Ok
Actual quote from that movie.
Kitty: Give it to me, Stud. Give it all to me. Go ahead, Stud, give me all your juice.
Im thinking that Stallone played the part of Kitty.
“When I look in the mirror, it’s I see two people. The left side of my face and the right side of my face.”
“You ever feel like the TV is watching YOU?”
“Blood usually tastes like pennies but mine tastes like hairspray.”
So is today “Twitter News” day?
Stop or My Mom will Retweet.
“KEEP PUNCHING” is great advice when dealing with a girl playing hard to get.
Dude, wake me when Walken gets a twitter account. Cause then…then all bets are off.
Have you ever looked into a coked-out hooker’s eyes and thought there’s a person in there?
No? I haven’t either. Just a vacuous void of baby batter, and collagen.
Poor Rocky…..thinking Apollo’s spirit entered his labradoodle
Just saw this guy today.
http://twitter.com/slyfan1980
or just “Anthony”.