Gordon-Gekko-atBorders-wall-street-money never sleeps

I never would’ve guessed it after watching Shia LaBeouf chug a five-hour energy, down a Patron shot, drink a Heineken, and then wink at the camera, but according to a new revelation, Oliver Stone’s Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps got paid for product placement. I know it sounds like Star Wars, love, but it’s true.

Oliver Stone said Wednesday that his “Wall Street” sequel benefited “enormously” from product placement, which helped expand a tight budget without compromising the integrity of the film.

Of course not.  All critiques of greed should include copious advertisements.  “Sad about the bailout, Winnie?  Here, have an ice cold, triple-hops brewed Heineken.  That always cheers me up when I’m feeling down.”

“Fox is known as a tight studio,” he said. “We needed help, and we took it where we could without, I think, prostituting the movie.
“No big, big cash, no Gillette shaving cream,” he added. “There was no scene that we did out of the way specifically to accommodate.”

What could I do? I was like a monkey dancing on a razor blade. We didn’t sell our souls.  It’s not like Shia Labeouf had to cut off a fing–

All the sponsor support “helped us enormously,” he said. Corporate partners included Dunkin’ Donuts, Ducati, tech firms, and hedge fund firm SkyBridge. Starbucks wanted to come on board, but couldn’t because there was already a relationship with Dunkin’ Donuts.

Look, it takes product placement to get a movie made these days.  That’s just the reality of the business until someone invents a better way.  An innovation that could change the future.  Something like… LASER FUSION!  THE FUTURE OF THE SUN’S POWER AND THE POWER OF MY SON’S FUTURE