Brand new footage from Black Swan!
09.01.10Okay, okay, look, I’m not going to pretend this post is in any way movie-related, but I simply could not resist a video entitled “Fat ballerina falls and cries.” It’s just science. I’m really sorry about this, you guys. To make it up to you, I wrote you a haiku.
Fat ballerina
Tried to do a dance but failed
The audience clapped.
[via oncampusdrama - thanks, Burnsy]
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La Gioconda: Dance of the Hours
(or in this case, “fail of the day”)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAjHGG1FsRA
I swear that was fucking hilarious.
If only she’d start masturbating.
Big girl in purple
Wears a moo moo not tu tu
Ate many hot dogs
I didn’t know Chris Farley had a sister…
She is a regular Twinkie toes.
Be careful with haikus. Next thing you know, we’ll have Hot Chicks With Douchebags commenters swarming us.
She’s not light on her anything.
Admire the bravery you louts! A jumbo ballerina, way to try and break the Jello mould.
Her ballet shoes are steel belted.
It’s the dance of the High-Blood-Sugar Plum Fairy.
True story! She met her lesbian girlfriend at the Winerschnitzel in Alameda!
To make her tutu they had to sew two tutus together.
After that performance, the audience threw flours onto the stage.
Later, she’ll do the Nutella-on-a-Cracker Suite.
Disney is pulling this video down because of the obviouse copyright infringement vis a vis Fantasia.
That was her version of the Buttcracker.
She’s a prima-beef ballerina.
When she spins on one leg, it’s just called a “pirou.”
James Lee immediately ran on the stage and tried to drag her back into the ocean!
Unfortunately the recital was in Riverside, Iowa.
I’m a regular potatoe head like Dan Quayle.
Needs more jack handle
From that screen-cap, it appears that she may have pulled her ham-bone.
This is what happens when you try to get black guys to go to the ballet.
Hamrope would have been better. FMLIFD
The only barre she can get her leg on is the one at the meat island at Hometown Buffet.
Buffetrina.
Whelp, I need to start looking for another starting fullback on my fantasy ballerina team… Shit.
She is flattered that you would try and Coppélia feel.
She puts the pie in Plié.
I bet her black boyfriend didn’t think it was funny.
I think she’d be way better at belly dancing.
It appears that she eats it all the time.
So in Swan Lake a ballerina goes down?
At that moment she decided to become an anorexic, because she got tired of eating shit.
She’s been dancing with the starches.
Wait wait;
The ballerina in Swan Lake went down, comfort her.
She also dances the meringue.
No matter what show she’s in, she plays the lead.
Now re-read that last word as if it’s the metal that Superman can’t see through.
Clompa-clompa-clompa!
For some reason, He is reminded of these White Zombie lyrics:
Falling down I am a psychoholic
Erratic and sure I cannot fail
Replay slow smooth and automatic
Go easy riding danger
Ballerina twirls
Falls and breaks her tibula
Jockey gets shotgun
Seriously. You hate to see a team lose their starting left guard to an ACL injury right before the season. I hope this doesn’t impact the running game too heavily.
@Crappy, it’s called a fourfour.
When she spins, the other dancers get caught in her orbit.
Fuck, I meant her gravitational pull.
It’s nice to see that KFC is sponsoring ballerina events now.