Cool starry bras and morning links
09.02.10
I don’t what it is about this picture, but it makes me laugh like a c*ck weasel every time. [Thanks to Stone Soup for the tip]
DAILY CIRCLE JERK LINKS
- Burnsy’s Is It So Hard To Love Microsoft News? (yes) |UproxxNews|
- CHECK IT — this week’s Comments of the Week winner wins Sons of Anarchy on DVD, so bring your A game. |CotW|
- Sweden gets world’s largest drum machine. Just what they need. |GammaSquad|
- The Discovery Channel gunman f*cking loved squirrels. |WarmingGlow|
- Real Fun with Fake Weed. This reminds me of a Mitch Hedberg bit. |TheSmokingJacket|
- Sex in Games, Five Years After “Hot Coffee”. |UGO|
- “What we learned at the Fan Expo.” (some kind of Canadian Comic Con). |HolyTaco|
- Women Dies After Getting Stuck IN Ex-Boyfriend’s Chimney. |BarstoolSports|
- Jamie Foxx doing a sketch series for Fox. |ScreenJunkies|
- The hottest pinups of 1985. |Pajiba| (NEEEEEERRRRDS!)
- Break out the eye bleach, it’s the Miss Juggalo pageant. (NSFW) |DrivenByBoredom|
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Buy-FilMDrunk-shirt-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2011/09/Juggalo-boston-mom-150x150.jpg)
*breaks out the good stationery*
To Whom It May Concern:
Re: Miss Juggalo Pageant
Dear Sir or Madam,
I hate you.
Sincerely,
The Jersey Devil
*puts down pen, continues eye bleaching*
The Mighty Feklahr is certain Dr. Jacquelyn Kotarac was having an affair with Jolly Ol’ Saint Nick. That fat baktag will stuff a bitch in your chimney if you “ruin his cookies and milk”.
Woha, anyone else just get chub?
Whore #1: “And for the talent portion of this contest I will read The Cat in the Hat”
Judges: “BURN THE WITCH”
I have to give it to the girl with the muffin top giving a lap dance while holding a cigarette in her left hand. If that doesn’t sum up what it means to be a Juggalo, I’m not sure what does.
The talent portion for all Miss Juggalo contests ends with who can read the most eloquent eulogy for their babies.
Jazmyne Shugga: “Yo Biskits may have only been Down With The Clown for six months on this Earth until she got bit by The Boogie Woogie Wu–fuckin’ inoculations, how do they work?– but you could see the way she cried when I took her facepaint off for the judge meant she was shaping up to be truly one of the illest Juggalettes The Gathering had ever seen. May your Faygo never need a refill in Shangri-la.
In Violent J’s name, Woot Woot.”
All: “Woot Woot.”
I know there is a dude out there who’s special kink is bruises, stretch marks, and random dirt smudges. That dude is having the best morning ever.