The Willy Wonka Alternate Ending
07.09.10Here’s the alternate ending of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory that Paramount didn’t want you to see. Or as I like to call it, “how Michael Bay would’ve done it.” I know how Grandpa Joe feels. I said the same thing every five minutes during the Tim Burton remake.
[via AttackoftheShow]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Jurassic-park-busey-sax-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/01/Xena-boobs-love-the-smell-150x150.jpg)
This would’ve made the new one so much better. That doesn’t exactly put it in an exclusive category though, does it?
*Guitar slide*
Mac-GRUB-er!!!
Erswi, watching my own mother get raped by a pack of Mel Gibsons would have made the new one so much better.
Another alternate scene
Violet Beauregarde: Help! What’s happening to me?!?
Willy Wonka: You’re an embarrassment! You look like a f***ing pie in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of o**mpa l**mpas, it will be your fault.”
*Punches Veruca Salt in the tits*
You lose, good day.
Oooooh. Close one, Donk. Uh, sorry?
*Checks Filmdrunk bylaws, sends self to corner*
Would it be a pack of Mel Gibsons? What is the appropriate collective noun for that?
Funny thing, more than three Brandon Lees would qualify as a murder.
Cum with meeeee….
And you’ll beeee….
In a wooorld of strangle masturbation.
Test audiences rejected the alternate ending, saying things like “Aw naw they di’nt” and “Um, yeah… I was promised a free popcorn?”
goddamn, that made my day.
Don’t mess with a guy wearing a top hat . . . that guy has seen some shit.
It’s ok, Bubb. It was more a dick scuff, so I liked it.
Swi, we could go with a “rally” as the collective noun for a bunch of Mel Gibsons. Or maybe a “caucus”, because that sounds kind of like “caucasian” and Mel only likes those kind of people.
All Burton had to do was put Helena Bonham Carter Burton Bottom into her Planet of the Apes chimp suit. All would have made sense.
I was hoping Wonka was gonna stick his willy in Charlie’s chocolate factory.
THE DINGLEBERRIES TASTE LIKE DINGLEBERRIES!
If Vince is to be believed, it would appear that another plot twist they’ve kept secret this entire time is that Grandpa Joe knocked up his Daughter.
Sorry. I’m just full of piss and vinegar today. Momma was feeling weird and frisky last night.
Wouldn’t it be a Klan of Mel Gibsons?
*facepalm*
“If the good Lord had intended us to walk, he wouldn’t have invented Stephen Hawkin’s wheelchair.”
The taffy-pulling room just got sexy.
I think I like gaggle of Mel Gibsons. Gaggle sounds just crazy enough to survive being associated with him succumbing to the insanity. The correct term used to be “litter,” but Mel didn’t like it, so he killed it and ate it, along with all his other siblings.
Grr, WITHOUT succumbing to the insanity.
*punches keyboard for being a sass-mouth*
http://www.theleakingfaucet.blogspot.com/
“I know how Charlie’s father feels.”
Hey, mother fucker. That’s not his father, that’s Grandpa Joe.
<3
And this video is great. Thank you for sharing.
Fuck, you just pwned me like a N00b. It shall be corrected.
Remake? What was remake about the Tim Burton version? Gene Wilder was in the weird bastard child version.
But awesome ending.