Friday Free for All is the time of the week I reserve for all the things I really wanted to post that might not be strictly movie-related. So please, do not ask me “Dude, how is this movie related?” Or I will punch you. Send your tips to lance@filmdrunk.com, but only if they don’t suck.
If you don’t know who Bangs is, you need to drop everything right now (EVEN IF YOU ARE HOLDING A BABY) and watch this video . In a subculture that’s often accused of misogyny, criminality, homophobia, and unchecked materialism, Sudanese-born rapper Bangs is an oasis of politeness and wanting to buy you popcorn.
Bangs recently parlayed his level of awesome internet fame into a Honda commercial in his adopted homeland of Australia (he’s lived in Melbourne since 2004) — hence the multi-colored Monopoly money and steering wheel on the right side. The theme of the commercial (“How much rap can you fit into a Jazz?”) also exemplifies the charming, characteristic Australian awkwardness with black culture. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense (chicks and gold chains equals… rap?). But the central conceit of the plot is forgiven when we get to hear Bangs sing a rap song about the Honda Jazz. It’s hard to choose, but I think my favorite line was:
“10 cups holders in this car
so your drink be by your side
never far.”
If you don’t like Bangs, you have no soul.
[via Bossip]
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It’s ten times better than urban rodents comparing a Kia Soul to a toaster.
Did they say rap or rape? Because trust me, you can fit a LOT of rape into that car.
Eff you Donk. B/c I was gonna get with this.
I could watch dumb hot girls awkwardly dancing for hours.
Man, this deaf guy sure knows a lot of white girls
I just want to hug the little guy, It’s not nice to exploit the handicapped
@DH, and 100 times better than any Black-Eye Peas’ song.
@ateUnder I put up with the Black-Eye Peas because that chick with the long, dark hair is fucking HOT.
[Guns down Kia Soul rodents with Remington 700 Varmit rifle]
Silly black guy, black people can’t even have bangs, fros don’t grow that way.
In Australia rap sounds like “bling bloop bonk”
WTF, is he trying to tell me the turtle ith dead? I don’t understand this at all. And did you see those girls try to clap? Talk about having no soul…
*Brett Ratner pulls up to McDonalds drive thru window in brand new Jazz*
One MILLION Honey Mustard Snack Wraps, garcon!
*looks at camera*
Hey, that scientist said the Jazz could hold a lot of WRAPS, right?
*Price Is Right “Fail Tuba” blows*
I didn’t see the stash in the dash with enough room to hold two heaters
Jane Fonda is sad that this is another front-engine car from this manufacturer. She’ll just have to keep waiting to prove Sir Mix-a-Lot wrong.
Fuck the Honda Jazz! Fuck it right in the ass! You see that piece of shit?! How the fuck can you loom over some pussy ass other driver in that puny POS?! Faggy ass Asians need to build some bigger roads! FUCK!
Prostitutes don’t have souls Michelle. At least not in the areas I’ve looked.
Jazz? More like scat.
Multiple Miggs hand a jizz.
Prostitutes do too have soles. That’s what they use to stomp on Daddy’s yam sack. That and 8 inch clear heels, of course.
I’ve been a fan of Bangs since his Darfur days… His stuff was a bit edgier back then. His first album, “My Family was Slaughtered by Janjaweed Marauders”, never was released, but it was a bit edgier than the stuff he’s putting out now.
Bangs is a Sedanese rapper now.
Hold the phone, Bangs. Popcorn holders?? You do know what I like.
I hear that once you get in an accident, it turns into the blues.
I KNOW WHERE THE FUCKING CORNER IS, THANK YOU!
Dingus, I bought that one at one of his first shows out of the trunk of an elephant. It cost me two chickens and a goat, but that shit was fiyaah son!!!
Freight-If it was an African American rapper, it would have been popcorn *chicken* holder. Wa’qa wa’qa!
Furthermore, if it was an African rapper, it would have been a few grains of dried out rice with flies buzzing around it with bloated children in the back seat.
C’mon Bangs, you couldn’t compare the Jazz’s airbags to any of those bitches’ breasts? Tisk, tisk.
For just the price of a cup of coffee a day, you could send Bangs to the movies with a shit-ton of bitches and rap packed into his new whip.
Hmm, I always suspected that I didn’t have a soul . . . my fears have been confirmed.
I didn’t even know they had black people in Australia. Probably the reason why he’s the biggest rapper out there.
I just want to say that his nails scare me
I wonder what the dancing girls are thinking. “Wow, Bangs is the best rapper since Vanilla Ice!” or “Wow, Bangs is the worse rapper since Vanilla Ice!”
*Fuck you Vince, if I wanted to be gang raped by a Lost Boy of the Sudan I would never have broken out of that Egyptian prison in the first place. That was some serious Lost Boy Love in there.
* I know this requires that you have some knowledge of geography and current news events but just trust me it makes sense.