McG-Nipple-exam-TomHardy

Casting Updates:

According to Variety, Rihanna will be making her acting debut in Battleship, the Peter Berg-directed, Universal-Hasbro co-production based on, yes, the board game. Set to co-star Alexander Skaaaaåaårsgååärd of True Blood and Taylor “The Canadian Gambit” Kitsch, last we heard, the premise was an international, five-ship fleet engaged an intense naval battle with… aliens.  They don’t say what role Rihanna will play, but I’m guessing a super-hot special forces agent, or a nuclear physicist in tight leather pants.  Or perhaps the admirella, ella, ella, ella, eh eh eh this sucks.

Tom Hardy has replaced Sam Worthington opposite Chris Pine in This Means War.  Sounds good so far, right?  Bursting onto the scene with Bronson and following it up with Inception, Hardy has been getting near-universal rave reviews for his acting, not to mention being total dreamboat.  For his part, Pine managed to out-lovable-rogue Shatner as Captain Kirk in Star Trek, no small feat.  And now for the bad news.  This is a McG project. Here’s what we knew last time I wrote about it, when Seth Rogen was being considered for the role:

The story follows two best buddies whose friendship is put to the test when a woman moves into their spare room. As they fight for her affections, New York City is literally left demolished in their wake — including such landmarks as the Empire State Building and the Statue of Liberty.  Rogen and Pine are being considered for the role of FDR (a character named after the late President because his parents had high hopes for him) — after James Franco officially passed [and Brad Cooper dropped out because of a "scheduling issue."] TheWrap

If the world were fair and you went into a pitch meeting and said, “Hancock and My Super Ex-Girlfriend meets Bride Wars as directed by McG,” you’d leave covered tar, feathers, and stab wounds, like after a Danny Trejo barbecue.  Just say no, Tom.