Mornings that include a new Parry Gripp song are better than Christmas, Halloween, and Fajita night rolled into one. This one’s called “Paul The Octopus”. He picks the winner when he eats his dinner. (*sniff*) It’s just so godd*mned beautiful.
DAILY CIRCLE JERK LINKS
- A Guide to Disney’s horrible female role models, with photo evidence. I like this, because, as I’ve said, the Disney Channel is creating a generation of booger-faced Mervin’s mannequins. |Uproxx|
- A Comic-Con Cosplay how to. |UGO|
- Canned sandwiches may not taste great, but boy are they stackable. |GammaSquad|
- Steve Urkel arrested for punching the sh*t out of his wife’s implant. Said Mel Gibson upon hearing the news, “I always knew he was one of the good ones.” |WarmingGlow|
- Punté’s award-winning coverage of the World Series of Poker continues. |WithLeather|
- Miller High Life has a fancy new look. Miller High Life > Coors Lite. There, I said it. |SmokingSection|
- Peter King talks soccer, gets dissected. |KissingSuzyKolber|
- An open letter to that guy who honks as soon as the light turns green. |HolyTaco|
- Kathy Sanders hotness. |GorillaMask|
- Alessandra Ambrosia in lingerie. |Guyism|
- G4 talks to my be-Jew-fro’d mentor, Adam Carolla. |G4|
- “Armor made from ‘bullet-proof custard’. Finally a use for British food”. |Fark|
- The Expendables as an 8-bit videogame. |ScreenJunkies|
- 6 Iconic Sports Videogame Characters: Where Are They Now? |CollegeHumor|
And finally, FilmDrunkard Glenn discovered that Dreamworks Face may have infiltrated Pixar toys:
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/01/iron-man-3-poster-tony-stark-falling-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/08/Mona-Lisa-Touch-up-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/07/WBC-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/06/Hulk_vs_Bear-150x150.gif)
If you watch the first Toy Story, you’ll find Buzz Light year invented the Dreamworks face, but failed to patent it.
So if I blow my load on Buzz’s head, he’ll have wet-Dreamworks Face.
Miller High Life > Coors Lite
GODDAMMIT MANCINI, HE *WILL* FIND YOU!!!
Seconding Fek. I’ll start looking up deed records.
The shape of Buzz’s body reminds me of that Bunny Goddess chick.
I’ve never had a beer that was worse than Coors Lite so I’m going with Mancini on this one. Especially if the MHL is in ponies. And you’re drinking it ironically.
Something, something, exposed brick.
I’m with Fek and Zero. Now you’ve went and done it. You went out blogging about your love of Miller products looking like that and now your going to get BTK’d by a bunch of Midw****rners.
Aaw, Parry is helping to rehabilitate the octopus’ image after centuries of bad press in Japan.
I’m looking at you, rapey octopus painting in Bert Cooper’s office.
Bah, how hard will it be to find a curly haired yIntagh faggot with a girly giggle in San Francisco?
Dor sho gha! Is the Glenn holding Buzz Lightyear from Oregon???
The MW3 are going to bury you in the flower garden! You fucking deserved it!
OMG TEH MOUNTENS TERN BLU!
I’m more of a Boones Farm man myself thankyouverymuch.
Vinny has actually said it before but it bears repeating. How in the hell do you claim to have the coldest tasting beer? W.T.FU!
Motherfucker, it’s the SILVER BULLET. It kills fucking werewolves. QED.
A werewolf can still do plenty of damage with liver disease.
Hypercolor beer cans is the dumbest gimmick on the market, narrowly edging out twisty glass necks.
Beer is beer.
The Coors family and their Nazi style sense get the nod. The Silver Bullet does look good in the hand.
Why did he have to use that image of paul, it´s hurting my feelings.
Beer is beer until you taste a good beer. Then what used to be beer is piss. I´ve not yet tasted coors or miller but from what I´ve read they fall in the piss category.
Sorry, the worst beer ever is Keystone Light, it tastes like what they use to wash out the old vats of Coors Light.
Coors Lite is like having sex in a canoe. F*cking close to water.
Good beer tastes like some or other grain. I’m done being treated like a farm animal.
(ketamine excepted)
You people that are shittin’ on Coors need to remember that men went a long way in a short time to let some of us enjoy the Colorado Kool-aide.