Little Fockers opens at Christmas time and promises to be the most hilarious comedy threequel since Austin Powers: Goldmember. Last night they released the first trailer. Here are the jokes it includes, in chronological order:
- “I can’t wait to see those little Fockers,” says Greg Focker’s mother in law, incorporating the title of the movie in the most realistic manner.
- Ben Stiller tries to carve the turkey, but he’s not good at manly things because he’s a male nurse, so he cuts himself and squirts blood all over his wife like a bukkake film I once saw. Haha, blood squirting from a wound. Classic.
- “I’m watching you,” (*eye point*) Haha, remember that joke? It was really funny, they should repeat it a few more times.
- Deniro eats all of Ben Stiller’s Viagra, so Ben Stiller has to stab him in the d*ck.
- Kid sees Deniro getting his d*ck stabbed, screams like Macauley Culkin.
Phew, my sides! It’s a good thing these broad Hollywood comedies are still doing somebody-accidentally-took-the-wrong-pills jokes, if you ask me, it doesn’t get any better than that. I just hope this doesn’t interfere with his important business meeting with the Japanese! I smell hijinks!
[Also available in HD at Apple]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Morgan-Freeman-last-vegas-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/if-i-showed-you-all-the-money-shots-in-pacific-rim-youd-have-a-70-minute-orgasm-filmdrunk-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/trailer-rapture-palooza-starring-craig-robinson-and-anna-kendrick-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/About-Time-POster-150x150.jpg)
Hilarity ensues when Deniro informs Stiller that not only did he take all of his Viagra, but all of his Hydrochlorothiazide, too!
HEY, FUCK YOU! PHARMACEUTICAL HUMOR KILLS ON KRONOS!!!
Haha! Fek, you slay me! Viagra and Hydrochlorothiazide! He can get a boner but can’t maintain it due to fluid loss! Hysterical!
Not even gamma-Hydroxybutyric acid could get me into the theater to see this.
That and it makes you pee a lot, too. Deniro would be a walking Water Willy.
Mr. Jinx took all of Ben Stiiler’s Viagra, too, but he just flushed it out of his system.
Deniro eats all of Ben Stiller’s Viagra, so Ben Stiller has to stab him in the d*ck.
If only Andrew Koenig had held on a for a little longer, he might have been able to get the role as the Boner Stab One.
And now that I’ve fulfilled my quota of Koenig jokes, I shall now move on to the Camerons.
Speaking of boner stabbers, I wonder how
CandaceKirk Cameron is doing?Stabbing? From about three feet away? Human centipede
is disappointquestions the 100% medical accuracy.Kid sees Deniro getting his d*ck stabbed, screams like Macauley Culkin.
Michael Jackson just got a boner in his grave.
I was about to dismiss this till I saw that Laura Dern was in it.
OHHHH…Focker.
I get it now, that’s funny.