Here’s Kelly McGillis with her Top Gun co-star Tom Cruise when they were 28 and 23 years old, respectively, in 1986 (left), and again at 52 and 47 last night at an event in L.A. (right). She still looks pretty good, but… damn. Kelly McGillis is 52? Yeesh. She’s a lesbian now, by the way, which is pretty sexy. Okay maybe not. But probably good news for, like, dogs that need adopting or whatever.
[TMZ]
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I would’ve laughed harder if Douchecat popped up, dick out, stroking it, while they were yelling “SWORD FIGHT! SWORD FIGHT! SWORD FIGHT!” in Tarantino’s thing.
p.s.
There’s no such thing as lesbians. Just bitches that haven’t let me twirl that cervix.
Tom Cruise: “Kelly McGillis is gonna be at the event tonight? I’d love to reunite with her! As long as there are no gays there”
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease took my breath awaaaaaaaay….
This is one of those cases where measuring dicks THEN and measuring dicks NOW would have a very, VERY different outcome.
She’s lost that loving feeling. And the ability to use turn signals.
Hey dumbass. Dame Judi Dench wasn’t in Top G…..oh wait.
True story: I went to see Conan’s show Saturday in Tulsa. A girl sitting near me asked if she could take my picture because she was telling her friend that I looked like Tom Cruise over text and her friend didn’t believe it. My response was “Really? He’s like 4’2″ in heels”.
/random
The real question is which one turned the other gay.
Banner Pic:
Left: Sexual Icons
Right: Homosexual Icons
It was your heels that made you look like him, Jirish.
I didn’t know that Tom Cruise hung out with Tyne Daly.
When the photographer asked Kelly to drape her arms around Tom so as to recreate the photo, she politely told him “Go fuck yourself and take the goddamn picture. Portia De Rossi just got here.”
Take my beard awaaaayyyyyy…
I didn’t know that Tyne Daly hung out with Bilbo Baggins.
What’s the over/under that Angelina Jolie has tasted Kelly’s milkshake?
I’ve beat my meat to worse images…….
See Top Gun 2!! Thrill to learn how Maverick left the USN when the F-14 was retired and is now a disgruntled cargo pilot for FedEx angered that he is only making $40k a year. Charlie lost her job after the Cold War ended, military budgets were slashed, she went gay, her snatch dried to men and she couldn’t fuck to save her job. She is now a functionary at a feline rescue group and has 11 cats in her loft apartment.
I don’t even know how they got them in the bed together. I thought a gay dude and a lesbian repelled each other like opposing magnets.
Val Kilmer was outraged that he wasn’t invited to the reunion then remembered that it would’ve been too expensive to airlift him to the event
Fuckin’ gay magnets – how do they work?
Wow, Lince…slow news day?
*checks the tank, sees if there is anything left*
Well, this will be scraping the bottom of the barrel, but By Kahless’ beard, He will do something to unfag your blog a little!
*gets into character*
*a feeling of dread encompasses the crew of the USS Filmdrunk as the lights dim and the Red Alert sounds. The telltale signature of increased neutron radiation can mean only one thing…Grethor has arrived!*
*incoming transmission*
Qaplah, kotal-kissing targ-fuckers! The Mighty Feklahr is here to communicate His other-worldly wisdom to your spineless, pansy-laden, treason-prone race of bipedal quadriped mating yIntaghs!
Today’s lesson is a simple one: There is always a bigger fish. The principle character in this story is The Mighty One’s patriarchal figure, “Lil”. You see, His father, Lil, was anything but “little”. This a rugged, beer swilling German man that stands at 6’2″, has the voice of a booming thunderstorm, and the physical prowess granted to only those that have worked in a feed mill for 30 years. Lil takes exactly two shits a day and drinks Old Style because in packs of 30.
Anyway, this story takes place one day when Lil got done with work early and decided to surprise his two sons by picking them, up from school, with presents of beef jerky in tow. He rolled up the street which he knew (because that was the way we were god damn instructed to go, by him) we would be walking and parked his 1975 Monte Carlo and started drinking his beer. (Damn straight.)
The Mighty Feklahr, the older of the two sons, came out first and found His father, and joined him in the car. Verily, we saw the younger brother come around the corner, but being pestered by two children (a boy and a girl). As these two children continued pestering His younger brother, the younger brother became angered and shoved the boy over, and went on walking.
Father and He watched as younger brother walked past a car and a little, Ferengi-Jew-like, squirrely man with a pedo-beard got out. His nose was all bent out of joint about something and he yelled something at younger brother.
Sure enough, younger brother sees Lil’s car and runs over. He informs Lil, “Dad, that guy in the car just said if I ever touch his kids again, he’s going to rip my arms off.” (Apparently the children teasing younger brother was this greasy little kotal’s offspring.)
Well, that was all ol’ Lil had to hear. He told us to stay put and moseyed on over to where Squirrely Man was loading his kids into the car and says to him, “I wanna talk to you. Do you like threatening children and trying to scare them? Do you feel tough when you do it? Well, why don’t you be tough with me? Why don’t you come over here and try to rip my arms off?”, his voice crescendoing into the loud wrath of Darth Vader.
The Squirrely Man blanched…his face as white as a ghost…the only thing he could muster was mumbling…”Please, sir…I don’t think we need any violence here.” Lil stared him down for a minute longer, then walked back to the car. He says to younger brother, “Let me know if that guy ever bothers you again. I’ll fucking kill him.”