The other day on the Adam Carolla Podcast (which you should all begin listening to immediately) Adam was talking to Michael Jai White about how there should be a television channel dedicated to playing just TV pilots from the 70s that never got picked up. Not only is that a brilliant idea, I say they take it a step further, and have another channel dedicated to just failed auditions. First there was Chris Klein’s Mamma Mia audition from earlier this week (which seems super fake, yet no one has stepped forward to claim as a joke yet), and now there’s this guy, an apparently Eastern European immigrant auditioning for a part as the new Gorton’s Fish Sticks guy.
It starts off super awkward, but it gets pretty funny later on. The move he does at “specially seasoned” in particular gets me every time. “Come on, Bru, come taste feesh steek. Ees only highest quality. I get from Lake. Look at me, Bru, you theenk I lie to you?” Really, I think every spokesperson should be an Eastern European immigrant. “Hmm, these taste suspiciously oily and my mouth is full of cat fur, but it’s nice to see that young man pursuing a better life.”
AFTER THE JUMP: A baby elephant in a kiddie pool.
Wow. I want one. If I had a pet baby elephant, I would be really nice to it, because an elephant never forgets.
[both videos via OhHaveYouSeenThis]
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I didn’t even know Kirstie Alley was pregnant.
*kisses fingertips* magnifico!!
The Gorton’s spokesman should be an Easter European, so I know it’s okay to eat on Fridays during Lent.
I could see “I whant my bord” being the new slogan for KFC.
Know how I know that’s not an African elephant? It’s in the water.
“Want” is a perfectly reasonable word, Donk. There’s no need to add an H.
OMG! It’s an Asian baby girl elephant! GET OUT OF THE POOL! THEY’RE TRYING TO DROWN YOU!!
That’s an Indian elephant, which is why no one else will go in the pool.
That’s actually a Mexican elephant. It got into the circus illegaly so that it could steal American elephants’ yobs. Also, its back is wet.
If an elephant spends too much time in the pool, is his skin all smooth when he gets out?
You know what else never forgets? My penis. Because herpes never goes away. Ever.
Ers, you’re fucking beautiful. Don’t ever change.
How come that baby Elephant looks like me getting on my knees to vomit in the toilet when I’m drunk?
Clearly that’s a Pakistani elephant. It’s a Pakiderm, you see.
And I made that comment cuz I got nothing. Tank empty. Dry hole. Well of sand. No mas. Jack shit. Chris Evans.
That’s funny, Pauly. I was thinking, why does that baby Elephant look like me when I’m doing a Bridge during my naked yoga sessions?
That Elephant isn’t Mexican, or else it would have drugs in the trunk.
I would not purchase his fish fillets.