A new trailer for Iron Man 2 is here, and it’s super lame. Ha, just kidding, it’s totally awesome. This one gives a deeper glimpse into the plot. This time around, Tony Stark’s urban sidekick gets his own suit of armor, then they band together to fight the Russian version of themselves. When you think about it, it’s a lot like Rocky IV. But I’m okay with that for the following reasons:
- Rocky IV is badass.
- AC/DC.
- Rocket hands.
I wish Don Cheadle had had that suit in Hotel Rwanda. “Ooh, what’s that, a machete? Suck lead, ya Hutu bastards. Yeah, yeah, now who’s crying to the UN, pussy.”
Thanks to Collider for putting this on YouTube.
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Huebel-gyllenhaal-carell-150x150.jpg)
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I wish Don Cheadle could also replace Gwyneth Paltrow.
“Tony, there’s stuff you don’t know about me…I’ll fuck a Russian up if he kicks ME in the dick!”
Here’s a better quality version of the video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oavMtUWDBTM
The Russian version of me has to head to the corner every time he says something like “In Capitalist America, expensive battle suit owns YOU!”
Is Monday too early to helicopter your nerd boner around in the medical library?
*cranks Shoot to Thrill on laptop speakers*
Tony Stark is the personification of “AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!”
Why can’t he be real?
Urban Ironman won’t save your life but he will steal your rims while someone else does!
If Tony Stark was real, his love scenes wouldn’t be as funny.
Urban Ironman reeks of weed and stares at your girlfriends tits.
I’m just saying, I’d marry that guy.
I get the symbolism of Rhodey wearing the black armor, but I’m not sure about the gray face plate. Is it supposed to symbolize him smiling?
The original title was Iron Man 2, based on the comic book Tales of Suspense by Stan Lee.
His face plate isn’t gray. It’s just ashy.
Urban Ironman likes to beat box while he waits for the bus.
You wikipedia’ed that, didn’t you?
Urban Ironman scares old people into cautiously crossing the street to avoid him.
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe.
*bats eyelashes*
Urban Ironman’s armor doesnt have guns or repulsors, but it does have 22 inch spinners, and 2, 12 inch subs.
Urban Ironman is always trying to bum a cigarette even though he’s already smoking one.
Sam Rockwell, eh? My nerd boner just tore my jeans.
Urban Iron Man gets 2 years in the clink while regular Iron Man gets probation and community service
Urban Ironman may have got his armor through the Wellfare department, but he spray painted it platinum to get him some bitches yo!
Urban Iron Man cured his own sickle-cell anemia.
Urban Iron Man fights for truth, justice and free Colt 45.
When done with Whiplash, Urban Iron Man is headed to the CIA to settle up over AIDS and crack.
Regular Iron Man might be able to hold down an office job, but he worries that Urban Iron Man might have bigger junk.
Urban Iron Man is sick and tired of the security dick at the mall following him everywhere.
Whiplash croaks “I must break you” or GTFAllthewayO
Urban Iron Man is the first to die or GTFO
Also: Burnsy FTW
Urban Ironman appears on the new bottle of Welch’s Grape Soda
Urban Iron Man is protected from malaria by a genetic mutation. Also, a big fucking suit of armor that.
….can fly
Urban Iron Man lubricates all his joints with shea butter.
*repels football thrown at crotch with still-helicoptering nerd boner*
Urban Ironman was made out of left over Amberlamps parts
Ironman’s power sources is now a triangle instead of a circle. Stark Industries has a strict Don’t Ask Don’t Tell policy….
Urban Iron Man can’t swim……
Urban Iron Man went to purchase some hand to hand weapons, but unsatisfied, left the market because he felt it hand sickle sale anemia.
Don’t mind me, just doing my morning stretches.
Urban Iron Man will never get married, but will have 15 toasters calling him Daddy
*Whiplash cracks whip on War Machines back*
‘You’re name is Rhodey!’
Latino Hood IronMan has a Virgin Mary on his left breastplate… Danny Trejo in IM3 or GTFO
I hope all is well with you. I just wanted to write you and say I hope you liked my previous comment and if you did and want me to win, please repost in the comment section of the latest COTW post and your friends who vote for the COTW, tell blacks, spades, crew with huge members, fart directors, special needs people, if everyone tells one or two of their friends, we will win and not fucking pauly dangerously, or burnsy, or chino, I need independent comments to win like the ones you and I leave, so if you believe my post is the best comment of this week, help me!
I’m sure you know plenty of people you’ve worked with who are assholes who troll this site, a writer, a sound engineer, please take 5 minutes and contact them. Please call one or two persons, everything will help!
best regards,
The Road Warrior Queef
*queeeeff*
Wow Queef, nothing like phoning it in….
no more talk! we go in! we kill!
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/02/hurt-locker-producer-forced-to-apologize-for-being-honest
IM3 Should have an Asian in it and be called IRON MAN 3 ” A CHINK IN THE ARMOR’
oh shit, did someone already say that? *crawls back into gimp crate*
i could do that i just don’t want to.