While we all wait for Mel Gibson’s Viking epic starring Leonardo Caprio, a movie called The Wild Hunt from director Alexandre Franchi is currently playing the Santa Barbara Film Festival. Finally, a film about Viking LARP (Live Action Role Playing) that doesn’t skimp on the sexual assault. It’s like they read my mind! Key line in the trailer:
“I know some girls, they role play medieval prostitutes and they have sex with men who pay them in fake coins.”
So where do these girls hang out? ‘Cause hey, I got fake coins. I got a whooooole chest full of ‘em. *leans back in chair* Anyway, I have a spy down at this film festival who assures me that The Wild Hunt is indeed as badass as it seems. It doesn’t have distribution deal yet, but be sure you watch the trailer until the end. Sh*t. Gets. Real.
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You can get coins for having sex with lots of men? I’ve been doing it all wrong.
*empty pocket book :(
Brett Favre’s favorite Viking LARP is floating a pass across the grain to scuttle a playoff game.
“Your honor, my client pleads not guilty on account of dork” is what my lawyer will say.
@noMo–you can even get coins for having sex with one man, plus a dollar for cuddling. Plus, if you fetch the prize goose from the butcher’s shop, I’ll give you half a crown!
They should have called it The Four Norsemen of the Apocalypse.
I enjoy L.A.rp, where we pretend to be Fox executives. “Motion capture Mighty Mouse reboot using real mice? GREENLIGHT!”
I don’t have any fake coins lying aboot, but how do they feel about Monopoly money?
The good thing is that when LARPers rape they’re usually done before their pants are off.
You can’t spell analrape without LARP.
The great thing about paying for sex with Monopoly money is that you can buy a hotel to do it in too.
If this movie had John Lithgow in a dress, they could have called it The World According to Larp.
If anyone gets IFC, check out the documentary on LARPers “DARKON”. It is amazing. Also, the “I’m not playing the game” actor was in Zack and Miri Make a Porno, lateral move, step up?
My friends and I like to role play as Vaudevillians.
We call it Larpo Marx.
I use this strategy when the girl I’m banging starts to feel guilty about cheating on her boyfriend.
“Hey baby, we’re just LARPin’.”
Careful guys, don’t want to piss off Spacetraveller.
Some of those chunkier prostitutes should think about getting larposuction.
I want a sitcom about Ohio LARPers, LARP in Cincinnati.
When your normal friends start falling off your social radar, that’s a bad case of Larprosy.
So, fake coins for getting fucked would be LARP bailout money?
Face-paint, idiotic costumes, unique terminology, fat chicks who put out, crippling social disorders….should the “music” beloved by the Juggalos be referred to as LRAP?
This movie just got a distribution deal in my pants.
Who wants some?
tonSa, I would say that’s a def call in question for the next Erswi420 and FekMeUptheAss show.
rapbas, I’m not callin’ those haterz again until I got the case of Faygo I winned from their last gay-ass contest. Fuken fagz owe me.
Try not to get too close to those guys: LARProsy is contagious, and makes your genitals fall off.
(the viking guys, not the radio guys. Those two have a WHOLE ‘nother thing to worry about)
A LARPers favorite periodical? LARPers’ Bizarre
The LARP prostitutes are referred to as LARPoons.
All this typing has given me LARPal tunnel syndrome.
Avatards find LARPing too depressing. They’re waiting for the Divine Unobtainium Motion Capture Reality Actualising Program.
DUMCRAP, for short.
LARP Diem!
I been lookin’ for LARP in all the wrong places.
When it comes to viking chicks, I LARP em’ and leave em’.
This explains why my butt is so Thor.
LARPers are no match for my L.A.R.P.
Live
Ass
Round
Pisol
When it comes to viking chicks, I like to get all LARP in their guts.
*Pauly hit’s Submit Comment*
Ahhhhhhh…..fucking “t”!
I’ve been looking for LARP in all the wrong places.
Dark Elven blackface > Dark Dwarven blackface
I hate it when the clock turns 2:30 or 3 here on the west coast, cuz that means the filmdrunk postings stop and i have to find other things to do to procrastinate from editing this dumb tv show. Don’t you know that movie news doesn’t stop at 5pm east coast time?
Ouch!
If some of it were to spill out of her mouth I’d probably make her LARP it up.
I was watching some wheel-chair basketball, thinking about how these chair-bound paraplegics were pretending they were 7ft tall, and I realized that they were LAVATARPers.
this is so much cooler than my Brittish Foppish Dandy LARP League
I wonder if role playing medieval prostitutes would accept payment in the form of pogs.
I paid a girl 100 fake coins and she let me go 1-Up in her.
Remember, to wear a condom when dealing with role playing medieval prostitutes. You don’t want to get a scorching case of the LARPes.
Ok, so that’s 3 grammar fails in all 3 of my posts here.
I quit.
*pulls up stool to the bar, orders a double whiskey*
Once at a LARPing convention, a girl caught me trying to slip her a rupee, so I hit her with a boomerang and ran off.
Wouldn’t a prostitute who gets paid in fake coins really just be a slut?
Not necessarily; she could just be really stupid
If you get to insert the coins, she’d be a slot.
A Larper of the Evening?
A streetlarper?
You’re still thirteen times less likely to get assraped in a Viking LARP than in an ancient Greek 300 LARP
Viking sluts love to get lutefisted.
And twenty-two times less likely to get assraped than in a Catholic Priest LARP
+1 Mort
And that’s exactly why I never put my money where my mouth is.
*leans sideways in chair, points butt-cheek at dog*
LARP!
LARPer? I hardly knew’er! Wow, my first trip to the corner
You can’t put too many coins in there. There’s not enough womb!
Does it matter if the coins are different sizes? I heard the “o”varies.
Eggsactly.
She’ll take wood n nickels.
Finally, somewhere I won’t get laughed at for having “a roll of quarters” in my pants
These guys travel to conventions in groups so they can use the LARPool lane.
“Special needs” kids enjoy SLARPing.
Fek’s Live Action Role Playing is abbreviated to “BTK”.
It’s ok if you pay them in pretend money, they’re pretending you’re somebody else anyway.
The annual national get-together is called LolLARPaloser.
Or “LOL-LARP-A-LOSER”.
Fuck it.
And do fake coins only get fake orgasms, Donk?
They prefer fake but will accept bonerfied coins as well.
Why would I pay a pretend prosti in pretend money when i can just pretend kill her and pretend get away with it.
I payed a girl for sex with fake money once. I think she was a braillete.
If two of the prostitutes go down on each other, does that make them LARPet munchers?
When these nerds get old they’ll probably join LAARP.
And do fake coins only get fake orgasms, Donk?
Who cares?
Good point.
If two of the prostitutes go down on each other, does that make them LARPet munchers?
You’ll find the answer to this question and more … here.
What is an orgasm anyway? Is that the Japanese art of folding paper?
If you click that link, you might find out…
I can’t believe you found it! And it’s Scatterbrain! DUH! No wonder I thought of that yesterday. Rad, no?
Gay viking fakes his orgasm by spitting on her back.
Rad YES!
I’m gonna have to re-”obtain” that album tonight.
I clicked on that link and now my peepee feels funny.
The LARP Rap, FTW.
Regency Films came up with an idea similar to this but it involved civil war LARPs…i think they are going to call it Gone with the Wind.
Aaw, I’m always late to the party.
I would only LARP if I got to be a princess. Did Vikings even have princesses? Don’t care; I’d be the princess anyway.