When I first saw the link “Kevin Smith issues final statement on the Southwest incident”, I was pleasantly surprised, first by the words “final statement”, then by the fact that the accompanying YouTube video was only three minutes long. Let’s face it, he had a crappy experience with a crappy company, it’s not Locked Up Abroad. Then I watched it, and all he talked about was the video itself and why he made it. At which point I realized I was only watching part one OF TWENTY FOUR. That’s right, after his hundreds of tweets on Too-Fat-To-Fly-Gate and an entire podcast, he still needed twenty four GD YouTube videos. I didn’t watch any after the first, but unless he fights a giant spider in third act, I’d consider them a colossal waste of time. And that’s coming from the guy who spent the last 30 minutes making this:
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But being locked up abroad isn’t as bad as being a broad locked up…
to my water heater in the basement.
I’m unveiling a new diet plan that I’m calling “Shakes for the Plane”.
*cheesy music*
If you’re tired of these mutha fuckin fatties on your mutha fuckin plane! *thumbs up*
Has Kevin considered the countless innocent private contractors that work for Southwest who’s livelihoods would be destroyed in this attack?
Kevin Smith’s desert palace is surrounded by so many Tusken raiders that he can’t even take his sail barge out to the Sarlacc pit…or Taco Bell
Also 24-parts, the number of brownies out of 24 that Kevin smith just finished out of a pan. There are fewer calories if you cut them all into smaller parts and then eat all those smaller parts, you know.
This is just like when the Wright Brothers wouldn’t let Orson Welles on their biplane.
Kevin Smith has promised to do one video for every 2 inches on his waistline.
I like Kevin Smith but even I am too lazy to click through 24 separate videos. YOU HAVE EDITING SOFTWARE, USE IT!!!
/serious cat
For some reason I’ve always liked this guy, probably because he’s a fay everyman, so I disregard that his movies are fucking terrible. But watching these two clips, he’s so amazingly smug and arrogant. He just loves the sound of his own voice, which must be why he orders so much food.
/birthday dog
*fat
Smith named his signature character Silent Bob because his Momma raised him not to talk with his mouth full.
I wish he was really Silent Bob.
He’s just pissed off he had to pay for the ticket; he thought Southwest’s motto was “Fags Fly Free”.
more like silent blob, am i right?
But hey, remember that anal sex scene from ‘Zack & Miri Make a Porno’? AHAHAHHAAHAHAHHA!
YOU DON’T SEE PENGUINS COMPLAINING, MR. SMITH! DO YOU?!??!?
Everyone is looking for the angle right now, but Kevin Smith only has one angle: wide.
Kevin Smith is currently recording another 24 videos complaining about how his remote is all the way over there.
so when exactly did kevin smith turn into the comic book guy?
I’m surprised Kevin’s Tweets are so accurate when he uses his poking stick.
Kevin Smith’s next project is an epic, 74 party riposte to Domino’s, entitled “What we talk about when we talk about EXTRA Cheese.”
Your brain fills in bits of sensory information based on what you’re used to seeing, what you’re expecting, and even activities that you’re doing. But that doesn’t explain why I glanced at the banner and saw “HOOKER DEAD”.
“When Kevin Smith flies” is the new “When pigs fly”.
Can we really blame Kevin Smith for making 24 videos about this? If he had any self control he wouldn’t have even been in the mess to start with.
Brett Ratner now gets to use the “It’s for Kevin Smith” excuse when he orders two nachos.
Talking burns calories. If he keeps this up, he’ll be fit enough to fly Southwest in roughly seven hundred thousand more videos.
Burnsy, I prefered your rant when it was “fay”.
Kevin Smith cheered up when he heard he can charter a plane, only to get sad again when they explained to him they said “charter” not “tartar”.
Couldn’t he just borrow one of the planes he’s currently swatting at from the top of the Empire State Building?
The only reason he flew Southwest is because he thought he could get those Southwest Egg Rolls from Chili’s.
New up.
are we sure that he and Michael Moore weren’t separated at birth?
But that Photoshop was worth every second, Lince.
From Jersey? Fuck. Kevin Smith is the Jersey shore.
Check out Kevin Smith’s new comic. Fatman: The Widening Crier.
[sodamyoar.blogspot.com]
The funny part is that this is still better than Gigli…Am I right?
Ha! Not so Silent Blob.