(“You mean to tell me the entire last season of The Sopranos was a dream sequence? That flies in the face of ‘Dallas’ vs. Board of Education.”)
If you want to get your script read in Hollywood, good luck. As Allan Weisbecker says, “No one in Hollywood actually reads anything.” Apparently, you’re better off sending it to the Supreme Court.
Conservative justice Antonin Scalia took time out of his busy schedule [Editor's Note: *dismissive wank motion*] to write a letter to an aspiring screenwriter who asked 10 Supreme Court justices (including retiree Sandra Day O’Connor) to weigh in on a 12-page treatment for a comedy film about Maine seceding from the United States to join Canada. The scribe, Daniel Turkewitz, wanted to know how the secession issue would play out at the Supreme Court.
Only Scalia replied: “I cannot imagine that such a question could ever reach the Supreme Court. To begin with, the answer is clear. If there was any constitutional issue resolved by the Civil War, it is that there is no right to secede.”
Scalia has also been known to cite Season 2 of “24″ to make a point on torture. “Jack Bauer saved Los Angeles … he saved hundreds of thousands of lives,” he was once quoted as saying. “Are you going to convict Jack Bauer?” [Reuters]
I know these guys are supposedly appointed for life, but if an eminent domain case ever comes before the court and this dude so much as whispers the word ‘unobtanium,” he’s fuc–ng fired.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/06/ElenaKagan-edward-jacob-150x150.jpg)
So the lesson to be learned here is that an old, white, male Supreme Court justice has no sense of humor?
The correct response is “No one would give a fuck”.
If there was any constitutional issue resolved by the Civil War, it is that there is no right to secede.
Also something about blacks I think. What am I, a historian?
I’m just glad he finally shut up about ‘Daddy Day Care’
I’d like Justice Sexypants on the left to rule on this.
*points to crotch*
Aw, she said she doesn’t deal in child welfare.
The lady in that picture looks like she’s having a staring contest with Serious Cat.
Miss Justice is doing the “pearl necklace” an injustice.
“Bona Sera, Bona Sera, what is it that you ask of me on this, the day of my daughter’s hearing?”
“What do you think of this script?”
*reads it for a minute*
“Come close Bona Sera,” he leans in, Justice Godfather slaps him across the face “Any Joe Schmo who has read a history book should know that Abraham Lincoln, God rest his soul, established the fact that it is illegal to secede from the union. In return for reading your script, I will ask of you one favor in the future. In fact I’ll ask it right now, read a history book for Christ’s sake and get out of my sight.”
Didn’t his brothers fuck up a courthouse in Ghostbusters 2?
Clarence Thomas: Tits or GTFO.
If Maine joins Canada, we’ll just annex our hat.