Okay so I made that last part up to make the headline more provocative. Nonetheless, it’s true that Tom Hanks will be directing and starring in Larry Crowne, from his own script. It’s set to co-star Julia Roberts, who last appeared opposite Hanks as a horribly miscast rich, old, Texas slut (the sluts are bigger and sluttier in Texas) in Charlie Wilson’s War.
I’m told that Hanks will play the title character, a man forced to reinvent himself and find a new career as he navigates the second act of his life. It’s a comedy with a relatable premise. Larry Crowne is the first feature Hanks has written and directed since 1996’s now classic music pic That Thing You Do! [DeadlineHollywood]
I like Tom Hanks. I liked That Thing You Do! I’ll probably see this. As long as he doesn’t put his bug-eyed, mouth-breathing, goon of a son in it. I swear, that oafish buffoon is like a colostomy bag filled with poison.
(“HURRRRRRRR.”)
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I swear, that oafish buffoon is like a colostomy bag filled with poison.
*slow clap*
Qa. Plah.
I hear that after Tom finished the script, he gave a copy of it to Colin to make paper planes with.
Colin Hanks writes his scripts in crayons, oatmeal, and poop.
Coke dealers also say “I like that thing you do” to Lindsay Lohan when she’s negotiating for an 8-Ball
A colostomy bag filled with poison?
Is Bell Biv Devoe back together?
If the producers of Charlie Wilson’s War needed a rich, old Texas slut then they should’ve just called Jerry Jones.
GIANTS BITCH
Fucker knows where the camera is judging by the banner pic. Stephen King and those other two ghouls don’t have a clue.
I need a bodybag!
Find a new career? Looks like Julia Roberts hit the casting jackpot.
I think it’s nice that Andy Garcia’s twin is hanging out with Tom Hanks now.
The woman in blue:
This theatuh is now-uh clee-uh.
Nobody’s seen POLTERGEIST? I enjoy it.
What the picture doesn’t explain is that Stephen King had a stroke while watching O.C.
Or Orange County, I forget the name because they’re both Ohio.
“a colostomy bag filled with poison”
Every colostomy bag has its thorn.
That kid looks like a whitebread version of Benicio del Toro.
The Larry Crowne Affair sounds boring as hell
Glad to see Bob Dole is doing well.
Godammit, that is Stephen King and his wife ? I give up.
Stephen King: Tom, you’re fucking standing on one of my skis.
Hey, thanks for the slutty Texas shoutout! Wheeee!!!
Julia Roberts is: rich.
Julia Roberts is: southern.
Julia Roberts is: slutty.
Julia Roberts is: kinda bitchy and preachy, too.
Uhm, which part of Charlie Wilson’s War was miscast, now?
Is Tom Hanks filming a sequel to Castaway?
Why is Stephen King’s father-in-law dressed like a chick?
Beeks, she was also supposed to be attractive.
Beeks, I’d also like to add lack of tits. And even tits aside (heh), a sexpot she ain’t.
From the headline, I thought there was a David Carradine biopic in the works.
Wait, wait. So, let me get this right. In a movie that is almost wall-to-wall tits (I mean, between the bombings and whatnot), you’re mad because Julia Robert’s tits aren’t as big as the other tits? Do Phillip Seymour Hoffman’s tits count?
Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! Is that the wife from ‘Jingle all the Way’? I hope Tom Hanks isn’t trying to convert her to Islam.
He looks muslim, kindof?
Bk, Are you just playing devil’s advocate here, or do you really think Julia Roberts was really right for the part of a slutty Texas socialite? Because if you think she is, we’re just going to have to agree to disagree here. I’m not saying I’m sad that her tits weren’t bigger (okay, maybe a little) I’m saying I just don’t buy her in that role.