Check out the trailer for the Green Zone, from Bourne director Paul Greengrass, starring Matt Damon, Greg Kinnear, and Brendan Gleeson. So get this, bros: Matt Damon plays some sort of rogue government agent, and he’s trying to do right, but he’s on the run from some malevolent bureaucrat. Slow down, Matt Damon, I don’t think the world is ready for you to play this kind of character. Oh hello there, dismissive wanking motion, I didn’t even hear you come in.
Essentially true fact: Paul Greengrass calls his trailer “The Green Zone” and his favorite joke is to sock people in the stomach and then yell “Shoulda been wearin’ your body armor!” It makes him laugh and laugh.
(Though Bourne’s brother considered himself a pacifist, they shared an affinity for scarves.)
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The Bourne Redundancy.
Haha, nice call. This is exactly like Stuck On You.
Will this have the challenging, thought provoking social commentary that I’ve come to expect from a Matt Damon project?
At least he’s not some faggot like James Bond who runs around and kills Eastern European guys while banging chicks. Man, that dude is sooooooo closeted.
“I know that you did.”
Fall off the face of the Earth?
Uhhh… I don’t know what this piece of shit trailer is, with its amateur-hour editing (I love the shot at :44 seconds of Matt Damon STANDING THERE), its molasses-like pacing and its Adobe Premiere graphics, but THIS is the official domestic “Green Zone” trailer: [www.youtube.com]
The Talented Mr. Booshley.
The Conformant!
Greengrass: So Matt Damon is this hitman, and by the time he comes, he knows damn well he has been cheated.
Guy from Golden Earring: Go on…
Greengrass: So he asks for help because this place is a madhouse and it feels like he’s done this before.
Guy from Golden Earring: So it feels like being cloned?
Greengrass: Yeah, exactly!
Guy from Golden Earring: I’m suing the fuck out of you.
Laugh all you want kids, but if it weren’t for Matt Damon, you’d all be speaking German right now.