Confucius was a legendary Chinese thinker who lived from 551-479 BC whose humanist philosophies continue to influence Asian society today so naturally the trailer for the movie about his life begins with flaming arrows and swordfights. Yaaah, do unto others as they would do unto you and tits and fire and heavy metal!!! And as the film draws nearer to release (opens January 28th in China, no U.S. release set), you can expect more racist pidgin speak from me, as I’m sure Confucius would’ve wanted it this way. Framing allows? Prease harp us! It stars Chow Yun-Fat and was directed by I-kid-you-not “Hu Mei,” as if that’s not just a bad Laurel and Hardy bit waiting to happen. In fact, I’m just gonna hit myself in the nuts with a pie and call it a day before this gets embarrassing.
[via Twitch]
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Who’s playing General Tso?
Only fitting that film begin with flaming arrows and swordfights. I was very precocious youngster. Hopefully they skip over part about me pooping pants in first grade.
I’d check this out but I’m allergic to MSG.
Jack!, fuck General Tao! Fucking chicken.
Why Will Smith not play me? Chow Yun Fat look like lazy pompous douche.
In chinese horoscope 2010 is rooster of metal
In the photo it looks like Chow Yun-Fat is admitting to the room that yes, he was the one who farted and he did enjoy it.
It figures they’d build that wall on a slant.
OK, “Outta Left Field With Fek’lhr” time:
Is He imagining things, or isn’t there some like weirdo “Rock and Roll Smurfs” lunchbox that was featured on the Simpsons once very briefly?
Or was it even Smurfs? Rock and Roll Snorkels? He is lost. }}:>(
How come Confucius isn’t fighting in that trailer?
Is he too yellow?
oh shit niggas you just can’t buy CGI fire like that around the corner
Because everyone wants some philosophy with their sword fights and explosions.
But, on the other hand, sword fights and explosions make everything better.
Did I see a shot of Lao Tzu off in the background in a hammock with little cup of rice wine ? Chuckling his ass off ? Well, I fucking should have. Crazy chinamen.
If loving this is Wong, then I don’t wanna be right.
In the picture, Confucius is saying “Go ahead, you can laugh all you want. I’ve got my philosophy.”
No wait, that was Ben Folds.
Fek: http://www.tvacres.com/enchanted_elves_happy.htm
Yay, Ben Folds reference!
Who was the producer on this? Hai Yoo?
Pauly, I never fight against man with wet back; they too slippery.
This trailer gave me a tiny little rice boner.