NIC CAGE BE SORCERING
12.09.09
(It’s Sorcerer’s Apprentice vs. Dragonball in the annual Ridiculous Hair Hadouken Hoedown.)
Foist your eyes on the first trailer for The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, which re-teams Nic Cage with super turd producer Jerry Bruckheimer in a high-octane thrillship to adventureburg. Just when you think you can’t handle anymore of your mind getting blown, Nic Cage cooks up some balls of magic and dangles them in Jay Baruchel’s face. Jay Baruchel is the chosen one, you see, and Nic Cage is to school him in the ways of sorcering. Of course he doesn’t know this yet, but you can tell he’s destined for greatness in the supernatural world, because in sh-tty movies, one’s future greatness in the magical realm is inversely proportional to how much of an unremarkable douche one is in the present. Keep dreaming, Danny Masterson.
UPDATE: Now with 100% more hadoukens!
Experience the majesty of HD at Apple dot com.
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At least fondling the glowing ball and a mop of hobo-hair distract from his neanderthal-esque forehead.
Banner Pic: Finally the answer to the age old question Why does it burn?
They filmed some of this in Park Slope, Brooklyn . . that subway scene is 7th Ave on the F line. They burned down a laundromat while filming in the area, from what I understand.
That trailer looks like a mash-up of Star Wars, The Matrix, and Harry Potter.
Season of the Witch Cage does not approve of Sorcerer’s Apprentice Cage’s hobbies.
I’m pretty sure that after watching the final cut of that movie, both Cage and Bruckheimer believe in magic.
I bet the look on the costume designers face when told he had to make that awesome hat for Nick Cage was pretty amazing. I imagine the plans involved one of those big architecture drawing tables and a bunch of large rulers.
What’s the Parseltoungue for gigantic, derivative piece of shit?
hhhssssssssssbruckheimersssssdisneyffffffsssscorpsefuckingsssssssspbbbbbtt!!
*Jay Baruchel digs his jockey shorts out of his ass, stares back at the green screen, looks past the camera lens*
“Sweet!”
Jay Baruchel has permanent “caught masturbating face”… will watch
JAR JAR! USE TEH BIGGZOR BOOM BOOM!
I’m holding blue balls in my hand as we speak.
*sniffs palm*
Most Hindus are out-sourcerers.
Ok…all Hindus.
I like how this looks because I’m a sucker for movies with Alfred Molina and fireballs. Actually, Alfred Molina and Fireballs should be a movie.