Man, how much more awesome would eating Chinese food be if this was on your place mat instead of that stupid crap about cocks and horses? Anyway, this is the Sam Elliot Zodiac. You should be able to embiggen in with a click, but if not, you can see a big version here. It’s pretty cool, though misspelling The Big Lebowski is a nut-punchable offense where I’m from (Nut Punch, Wyoming). I also notice that they left off Did You Hear About the Morgans? Sam Elliot. That must describe all those Chinese babies that drowned in the river.
Also,
[Thanks to Craig and Robopanda for the tips]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2011/10/Quantum-Levitation-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2011/09/Tom-Cruise-Crying-letter-150x150.jpg)
What year was Brett Ratner born? Pretty sure he’s Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid Sam Elliott.
Sam Elliot has a dick-broom that ends all dick-brooms.
Sam Elliot gives me a western-style tentpole.
instead of that stupid crap about cocks and horses
Mathew Broderick wants you to talk less about his wife and more about these cocks.
I don’t know what the hell makes him so ridiculously sexy, but I’d throw any one of you under a bus* for a night with that.
*I don’t really need Sam Elliot as incentive
Realli? I mean, realli? It looks pretti stupid when I spell like this. How can you not fix that before YOU GO ON THE INTERNET TALKING ABOUT LEBOWSKI?
I’d love to eat my dinner off Sam Elliot’s cock any day.
Neither embiggened version is readable for me, but thanks for reminding me he was in Quick and the Dead. Now I have to watch that after Tombstone tonight (how much wine do I have in the house – Chino, you drinkin’ wiff me tonight?).
DUH!!! I’ll bring the wine coolers.
Hmmmm …. no zodiac sign for Sam Elliott sans ‘tache?
Wow, I don’t know where that link leads, but my firewall sure didn’t like it.
Vince, we need more cromulent versions of those pics.
Chino – you gots snow yet? Stoopid Smarch weather.
Your firewall protects from clean-shaven Sam Elliott pics? That’s impressive…
Protects *you*…
Dumb hangover fingers.
“This website has declined to show you this page”. It wants me to log in or something. I think it’s being a bit pushy.
I got Big Lebowski Sam. You can tell from the white hat I wear that I am good.
I wear more of a hood than a hat, really. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to put some fried chicken in this “bear trap”.
I think you’d be better off with a “monkey trap”, Jack!
I’m a “Lifeguard” Sam, which means I am patient and I anger easily.
I’m just gonna sit here quietly until someone explains to me HOW THAT IS EVEN FUCKING POSSIBLE!
They also forgot Badass Super King Pilot Sam from Up in the Air
You wouldn’t like Hulk Sam Elliot when he’s angry.
Or Ghost Rider Sam Elliot at all.