11.06.09 JESSICA ALBA GETTIN’ BELTED: UPDATE
(It’s a turn on, because who hasn’t wanted to choke Kate Hudson?)
After the jump I’ve got the extended, American Film Market trailer for Michael Winterbottom’s A Killer Inside Me. I’m a little torn on whether to advise you to watch it, since it seems to give away the entire movie, but holy crap is it also awesomely disturbing. Some of the stuff that happens:
- Casey Affleck goes to Jessica Alba’s house, gets angry, pins her down and starts belting her butt. Surprise! She loves it, and bites the sheets. (!)
- Casey Affleck puts his cigar butt out on a dude’s hand. (Like a boss).
- Casey Affleck and Kate Hudson enjoy some kinky choke-play. (The best kind of choke-play).
- Two words: Aggressive fingering. (The only kind of fingering).
- Kate Hudson re-enacts the video for “Smell Yo D***“
- Casey Affleck beats the crap out of Jessica Alba. (Oh sure, they say they like the rough stuff until you learn to box).
Bottom line, this was all sort of disturbing and I didn’t know whether to jerk off or curl up like a baby and suck my thumb. So I did both.
UPDATE: I realize the video I added originally didn’t work for some people, so I attached a new YouTube version.
So of course this is all pretty sexual, but the only technically NSFW thing is a split-second flash of bare butt at the 59-second mark. If the top player isn’t working, trying the YouTube one below.
[via BloodyDisgusting, thanks to Matt for the tip]
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/02/WildHunt-1Shee-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/02/Ondine-LadyintheWater-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/02/ValentinesDay-still-cardiga-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/02/DearJohn-ChanningTatum-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/02/Cop-out-willis-morgan-150x150.jpg)
There are 24 comments about:
JESSICA ALBA GETTIN’ BELTED: UPDATE
*closes binder, takes off glasses*
So we all agree then that Casey Affleck wins Man of the Year?
Kahless Kurse His workplace!!! No videos. }}:>(
Really, tho, is there a girl alive that don’t like a good spanking?
Casey is such an amateur. Wanna give it to her good? Cover her mouth and nose with your hand, and when she starts gasping really hard stick a finger in her mouth until she almost pukes. BOO YA!
I dunno Fek, but I can tell you that the dead ones seem indifferent at best.
“Aggressive Fingering” is actually going to be the title of my next acoustic album
As filming wrapped, Affleck was named the ALCS MVP.
Now that you mention it, Hans Gruber would be a pretty cool band name.
How about “Hans Gruber and the Burnsies?”
Hans Grubers first single-
“Shoot. The Glass”
Aggressive fingering is way sexier than exploratory fingering, but what the hell else do you do when your diamond-studded tongue piercing comes off in there? It isn’t like if you wait long enough you’ll get a pearl-covered diamond or anything.
I’ve decided today I’m going to forego the usual attempts at wit and just skip straight to the gross stuff.
Rap Fusion B-Side –
“Nakatomi ain’t my Homie”
West Side till ya die, wuh-whaaaaaa!
Our christmas album can be “Now… I have… A machine gun… Ho…Ho…Ho”
Can anybody understand a single fucking thing Casey Affleck said? When will he finish going through puberty?
Aggressive Lingering is what Roman Polanski does outside of Junior high schools.
Hans Gruber’s holiday album: It’s Christmas, Theo. It’s the time for miracles
Man, I didn´t know smell yo dick. It´s awesome
New up, but less strangle-sex :(
Aggressive fingering is way better than passive aggressive fingering. Squeezing my thigh and giving me the silent treatment is really annoying.
3:24 to 3:40 is punishment for Good Luck Chuck, The Love Guru, and both Fantastic Four movies.
How can Bill Pullman and Elias Koteas play two different roles in a single movie if they’re the same person?
Did I just blow your mind?
Casey Affleck isn’t going through puberty. That’s menopause you’re hearing.
Hi, I’m Michael Winterbottom and my childhood was sexually akward.
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