11.09.09 ACTUAL NEWS: DMX DROPS OUT OF MMA FIGHT, REPLACED BY COOLIO
You guys remember when DMX did those movies Exit Wounds and Cradle 2 the Grave? Good, because that’s all the justification I’m giving for reporting this story on a movie site. It seems rapper DMX was scheduled to fight an actual MMA fight against Eric Martinez, who’s hard to research because he shares his name with about 50,000 dudes, 40 of whom I went to high school with. This was to happen on the undercard of a match between Butterbean and Tank Abbott. Let that sink for a second. Sadly, DMX has pulled out because the promotion wouldn’t meet some of his conditions. Namely, that the whole thing be faked for his benefit.
It seems as though DMX got cold feet and submitted an addendum to his contract that called for a guaranteed outcome. That outcome would peg him as the winner no matter what transpired during the “fight.” The “X” camp also insisted that their client is not a professional boxer but an entertainer, and that the event should (secretly) be held in good, clean fun. [MMAMania]
But fear not, for Coolio is filling in. The event is still scheduled to go forward December 12th and Coolio claims to be taking it seriously. Sources say that makes one person, one person in the entire world.
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/01/CungLe-tekken_marshall-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/game_plan-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/never_back_down_cam_gigande-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/bigshow-choke-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/09/vests-zacefron-150x150.jpg)
There are 22 comments about:
ACTUAL NEWS: DMX DROPS OUT OF MMA FIGHT, REPLACED BY COOLIO
Everything was going so well until Kooliaid busted through the wall and yelled “Oh, YEAH!!!” right before the building collapsed.
Sources know everything. They should have their own pedia.
Isn’t Coolio 58 or something?
46. Same age as Randy Couture.
I’d never watch MMA, but I’d pay good money to see Coolio get pounded into pulp.
“That’s for ‘Gangsta’s Paradise’! And THAT! AND THAT!!!”
Thunder Promotions? TP? Really? You couldn’t come up with a name where the abbreviation doesn’t imply crap?
Randy Couture? Sounds like a fruity French Fashion designer.
/as opposed to all the non-fruity ones.
Man, Butterbean looks like either a bald Seth Rogan stung by a shitload of bees or Twiddle Dee from Tim Burton’s Alice and Wonderland.
Um…Tank Abbot just looks like shit.
“Thats the first time DMX has ever pulled out of anything”, said 9 of DMX’s Baby’s Mommas.
Butterbean kinda’ looks like a reject Street Fighter character.
[Crappy c-walks up to Coolio]
You did that to your hair on purpose?
“Alabama Pride” is a girl making it to 17 without having a c-section scar.
Michael Vick is disappointed about this.
Remember when Tank Abbott was in WCW? He was the only guy that liked that boy band 3 Count!
I NEED A FUCKING LIFE!
I’d rather see Coolio fight Fedor.
Fyi tidy, Abbot always looks like that. Which is also why he’s one of the best fighters to ever grace the ring. All these pretty boys that train year round and “make weight” for fights don’t have anything on the guy who got a call at a bar asking if he could fill in for a fight and jumped on a plane.
I wonder what Ken Shamrock thinks of Tank Abbott following him into professional wrestling?
I met Tank once. My allergies were really acting up that day. I think I had a case of “Hay Abbott!” Fever.
Jacktion, he probably thinks “maybe I can fight him and pay rent this month!”.
Apparently someone at Thunder Promotions is dyslexic, because how else did we end up with retread MMA?
Ironically, it was DMX’s PR staff that led to him getting cold feet.
He misheard their promo line: “Nobody punches harder than our DMX-y can!”
If that is Tank Abbott looking “mean”, The Mighty One wonders what kinda look he gives the kids when they hop in the van???
new up
Comment on this post:
You must be logged in to post a comment. Not yet a member, register for free.