10.29.09 THE CHINESE STATES OF AMERICA
A reader over at CHUD snapped this spy pic from the set of the Red Dawn remake in downtown Detroit. Which is impressive, as I would’ve assumed one would have to attempt to dress and act like a homeless person in downtown Detroit in order to blend in, and that doing something like pull out a camera is like begging to be robbed and murdered. Anyway, the picture apparently shows the new American flag after a surprise invasion by the Chinese. It gives me hope that this movie will be xenophobic as all hell and let us relive the glory days of cold war action movies. Remember when Rambo went back in time and won the Vietnam war? That was awesome. Maybe this bit of revisionist history will stop the Chinese from being so uppity.
[full pic at CHUD]
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/original-red-dawn-cast-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/10/natllampoons-christiebrinkl-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/09/nightmare-elmst-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/09/wherewildthings-birdhouseso-150x150.jpg)
There are 52 comments about:
THE CHINESE STATES OF AMERICA
Amelica… FUCK YEAH!
No lie, I saw a kid’s toy of this little talking girl that teaches children Chinese phrases.
I don’t know what her actual name was, I just called her Dola Da Exprolah.
The Chinese invasion came to an abrupt halt when they realized that not only could none of them drive worth a shit, but the rednecks in Iowa disrupted their cell phone (with digital cameras, of course) signals with ROCK AND ROLL!!! (and empty beer cans launched into the atmosphere with those t-shirt guns cheerleaders use)
WORVELINES!
I remember a time when i was looking forward to Chinese democracy…
The invasion isn’t set to happen for another 30 years. They have to give all our children time to get lead poisoning first.
Take solace in the fact that Ord Grory will be well laundered.
Seriously, though, the thought of the USA being invaded is the biggest joke in the fucking galaxy. We are so twisted and violent, it wouldn’t last ten fucking seconds. Hell, there wasn’t a slant on this continent that wasn’t in chains before the last bomb in Pearl Harbor hit, and fuck, I would kill my own fucking sister-in-law (Chinese) just to be fucking sure.
Fuck you, rest of the world! We’re fucking Americans and we can arm the general populace with a snap of a fucking finger. We have guns and know how to use them, and we like killing foreigners. We’ll start nailing (err…thumbtacking) dead Chinese dicks to the walls of rice factories just for fucking fun! Hell, we’ll fuckin’ kill ya just to keep you from eating our fucking dog.
The ghosts of Mao and Swayze live on!
Whew, sorry, blacked out there for a sec…what did He miss?
This is exactly the flag that Chinese Betsy Ross would have designed had she not accidentally drowned immediately after birth.
Give the Communists currently in charge of the Federal government a couple more years and the Chinese won’t have to invade. They’ll be welcomed as liberators.
Chinese general say, “All your base are belong to us!”
At least we’ll finally be able to take care of those overcrowded animal shelters.
This is horseshit. The Chinese completely lack a sufficient blue water navy with the capability of mounting a trans oceanic land invasion with force numbers adequate to capture and hold any significant amount of territory and erect defenses capable of staving off the epic awesomeness of the USAF and uber-tech brute fuck offness of the US Army.
Lame.
If China really wanted to destroy the US they would just stop loaning us money and cash out all those bonds and T-bills.
They would never be so bold. Everybody knows General Chang’s chicken.
Yeah, but for every animal shelter that closes down, an orphanage will open up.
Soldiers of fortune cookies?
If this is going down they need to stop selling us tainted dog food. Makes no sense to poison your food supply before invading.
hehe
…tainted…
heeee
Crap-if you had went with “General Tsao’s chicken”, it might have been epic.
IT’S BURRITO TIME HOMIES!!!
That wouldn’t have worked as General Tsao IS bold. 5 stars.
In Chinese-Run America, Amendment #26 is beef with cashews and two egg rolls.
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