DCJ: MICKEY ROURKE WATCHIN’ FOOTBALL
10.16.09
Here’s Mickey Rourke watchin the Giants play the Raiders. Even hungover and disheveled, he still looks less confused than Eli Manning. CLOSE YOUR DAMNED MOUTH! via
And now, your Daily Circle Jerk Links, live from BDarbs’ fog palace in San Francisco:
- Oh, Meghan McCain, I’d vote for those titties. I vote you put them on my face. Hey, whatcha readin’? Is that Andy WHOREhol? HEYO. |NYDailyNews|
- Here are actors that replaced other actors. |GetBack|
- Seven reasons you shouldn’t help a girl move. Really, you need seven? |HolyTaco|
- Here’s a priceless work of art known as “The Rape Tunnel.” |FListed|
- If Weekly World News went Hollywood. |ScreenJunkies|
- Here’s WarmingGlow’s Matt Ufford’s guest-star turn in a video. He’s pretty funny, but I don’t why he’s wearing boxers. He always wore briefs with me. |WithLeather|
- MythBuster’s had a duct tape episode, and I don’t just mean when the host tucks his nuts back for a night on the town. |Asylum|
- 30 years of sexy ladies. |Guyism|
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/01/Mickey-Rourke-Gareth-Thomas-150x150.jpg)
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Diagram A: subject pre-Mickey slip.
Diagram B: subject post-Mickey slip.
*pees on floor* *thumbs up*
Manning looks like he periodically forgets how to breathe and yet makes millions of dollars per season.
Ufford looks like Peyton Manning without the extra chromosome and Drew Brees had a butt baby. I always figured he looks like John Favreau without the oozing machismo and sex appeal.
Sure, Mickey Rourke looks less confused than Eli Manning but can Rourke tongue out an Orea like it’s a jailhouse asshole?
If Mickey closes his mouth, how will his parrot see the game?
If he wasn’t uber-famous, Mickey would make every “Weirdo at Wal-Mart” email.
Favorite line from the Rape Tunnel article: “What happens when someone brings a gun into the Rape Tunnel?”
That’s easy, it goes from 5-7 years to a mandatory 20.
Vince totally owns Google searches for “fauxmeyist” now.
You’re welcome.
That chick from the sports blog video has the face for blogging. I wouldn’t face fuck her with Pauly’s
burritotaquito.Vinnie, we’ve been boys a long time, ever since your pops busted that bicycle shop owner who was molesting us. But I’mma ask you one time to watch your words about Meghan McCain. I’m going to make that woman very happy one day, you know, until I take half her family’s fortune.
Boxers AND a Three Cat Meow T? I heart Uffy so much right now.
Burnsy, you know damn well the Secret Service would shoot any Filmdrunkard before they could get within a mile of that girl.
They have our pictures you know.
McCain’s daughter really does seem like an insightful, well-rounded, down to earth young woman.
*makes motorboat noises*
Holy christ. I want to steal the puppy in that video.
FACT
If you drive a Van through a Rape Tunnel the whole world asplodes.
I went through a Crepe Tunnel once and came out french and gay.
One of them days, eh Vincenzo?
Ufford stole my shirt and Vince’s Megan Fox
jokestrategy.We’re gonna need a new banner pic. The glare from Rourke’s sunglasses has been shown to cause Progeria in lab mice.
I think Vinnie and Matt are fighting to the death for boPa’s loyalty.
Clearly, Vince thought that including the phrase “The Rape Tunnel” would be enough to keep us busy all day.
Clearly, it’s not.
More like BDarbs’ FAG palace!!! AAAHAHAHAHAH!!!
**checks screen name**
Fuck.