10.05.09 COREY FELDMAN IS STILL WEIRD

I know he never had a career but is this really the end?! Please! God! No!!!

In related news, Corey Haim will be starring in a web series called Fatter.

Corey Feldman is trying out for the role of one of the Under-The-Boardwalk Saints.

Jesus is this really what Joe Dante is up to these days?
Also I was watching the 1980’s Zucker brothers TV Show “Police Squad!” and just discovered Joe Dante directed several episodes of the shows short glorious run.)

Wait, so is this a movie series or Feldman’s video diary? I can’t tell.

Oh nm, this was just a metaphor for his career, I get it.

I didn’t know Criss Angel was Jewish.

Was that final verse to the Lion King song?

Corey Hart is still wearing his sunglasses at night.

Corey in the House still has agoraphobia.

Wow. Is he really that f’d up about Michael’s death? Sad.

Great! Now he’s going to fuck up Chucky’s career, too.

A teaser is supposed to tease you. I just saw everything I wanted to see.

Corey Ham is still delicious.

Nah Vodka, there’s still another hour of celebrities kicking his corpse.

Clatu Varata Nictu Mascara

Anyone who’s heard Feldman speak without a script can attest to the fact that he didn’t hit anything vital with that bullet.

WTF? He’s still standing!

He shoulda felled, man!!!

Warning: watching that video to Dark Side of the Moon may cause acid flashbacks.

Sometimes I’m glad I have no audio here.

Acting isn’t his strong suit spaz :(.

If only the bullet was hollow-Corey…

[Smells finger]
I had a good weekend.

*smells dick*
I had a better weekend.

Get away from my dick!

That’s not what you said Saturday night!

smells the gun used on Corey Feldman…

Corey Feldmen anagram;
Nerdy elf come

Hey, it was dark, I was drunk… bullshit! I’m just so lonely…

My butt hurts. I also had a good weekend!

Taco night?

Wow, from direct to DVD remakes of 80’s cult films to a web series made by washed up film makers. The Two Coreys really shocked that career back to life, dinnit? Get me that douche’s agent on the phone.

I had to spend this weekend disimpacting the bowels of this girl who really seemed to be enjoying it.

My weekend sucked.

With what Donk? A cake batter mixer?

This creepy old guy gave me some pills and some liquor and now my butt hurts but the good news is, he’s going to put me in a movie!

Sucked ass, Donk?

Eggs actly, Spaz.

Crap, the batter mixer was her idea.

My butt hurts. I also had a good weekend!

If that’s not the Filmdrunk motto, it should be.

I know it is a Corman production, hence the bad makeup across the forehead at the hairline, the obvious fx pack placement on the temple, the keeping his eyes closed for safety to avoid the fake blood hurting, etc. but then they manage to gloss over the most important part as if they thought it was obvious: you fall down when you shoot yourself. Okay, so there’s an undead angle.

Classic Corman missing the forest for the trees he himself planted.

Chino, didn’t anyone ever tell you to just breathe and relax it won’t hurt? Also, he was only supposed to put the tip in.

To see if it feels good ? Or is it to check the temperature ? Don’t want to get my protocols mixed up.

This shit still? Bah, He will just try to figure out lolcage then…pretty shitty yesterday, though.

This trailer is still not as embarassing as Feldman’s fish protest on Surreal Life.

If only that was a real headshot….

*sighs while looking outside the window*