09.18.09 A SCUBA TANK FILLED WITH FARTS
The Valentine’s Day trailer starts with that new Black Eyed Peas song and quickly transitions to a scene in which Anne Hathaway’s character refers to the crazy sex she just had with TOPHER GRACE. “Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you? I used to be a gymnast.” Wow. You guys are really trying to make me vomit, aren’t you? How dare you degrade my girlfriend like that. Did you know Topher Grace used to be in an a capella group back in high school? The Pussies, I think they were called.
On September 17th, watch the famous peoples’ lives intersect in horribly saccharine, unrealistic ways! Oh hey look, another boy in elementary school who’s in love! They should take a picture of him holding a red rose bouquet, then make all of it black and white except for the roses, and then I’ll frame it and hang it on my wall when I get to community college. God I want to curb stomp this movie.
Wow, someone getting hit in the nuts, I never would’ve expected that.
[check it out in HD at Yahoo if you hate yourself]


There are 25 comments about:
A SCUBA TANK FILLED WITH FARTS
The funniest joke in the video is the “NEW!” at the end of the title.
quit stealing random lines from me to title your posts!
A couple thoughts:
- While I would happily spend a Valentine’s Day with a number of the actresses involved, I can’t see a single reason to see this movie.
- I dare you to claim that “Love Actually” wasn’t mentioned in the pitch process for this movie.
10 bucks says Jessica Biel’s part was originally offered to Katherine Heigl.
Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you? I had been dying to try my new studded strap-on, “Safari Salami”!
I don’t even bother telling my one night stands that i used to be a gymnast. I just split. Usually with their purses/wallets, car keys, kidneys, etc.
Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you? I used to be a vannin’ pederast.
Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you? I used to be a cuddler, but now I am more of a “chainsaw-er”.
As you can see, the possibilities are endless.
This Valentine’s Day deserves a massacre.
What does being a gymnast have to do with anal?
Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you? I used to be a spooner. Now I’m more of a knifer.
http://creativestudios.com/creepy-cat-stare/
What? Perfectly relevant.
What does being a gymnast have to do with anal? They take a pummeling.
Robert Altman must be spinning in his grave. They should have named it Pret a Vomir.
I used to be in an a capella group, too. We get the hottest chicks.
Anne: “I used to be a gymnast, did I hurt you?”
Topher: “I’m fine, thanks. Hey, I used to be a fag does your breath taste like poop?”
“Saccharine” is a made up word used to disparage my people (The Irish).
Most gymnast’s careers end by they time they’re twenty. Is she saying she practiced sex a lot when she was a teenager? Does she think she’s better than me??? FU TRAILER!
I’ll see Valentine’s Day on one condition: at the end, the corpses of Al Capone and Bugs Moran rise from their graves and open fire on everyone involved in this movie.
“Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you? I used to be a gymnast.”
Well in that case heres your medal.
*proceeds to spooge her a pearl necklace*
“Last night was amazing. Did I hurt you?”
No, but he will.
*The Bear Jew busts through the door*
A SCUBA TANK FILLED WITH FARTS
You just descibed Jacques Cousteau’s coffin.
Oski: So what do you think of your cast?
Producer: An embarrassment or riches.
Oski: Yes, they should be embarrassed.
Producer: Ummmmmm???
Thank god that whole “Anne Hathaway loves anal sex” thing was an unfounded rumor or that trailer quote of hers would be waaay more disturbing.
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