UNDERGROUND MMA WEREWOLF FIGHT CLUB!
09.09.09Holy crap, this story just keeps getting better and better. Screenjunkies found this poster for Growl (above left), from which CagePotato rightly points out that the dude in it bears an uncanny resemblance to UFC fighter Phil “The New York Badass” Baroni (above right). Oh, but it gets much, much better. Turns out the movie is about AN UNDERGROUND MMA CLUB VS. WEREWOLVES, and the director’s name is “Sxv’Leithan Essex.” Unpronounceable AND it has an apostrophe? Your move, black folks.
“A traveling underground fight club called ‘The Brawlers’ arrive at a derelict ghost town tucked away in the Colorado Rockies. They meet the town’s only residents, the Maxilla family who want to buy on to the fight card. But the Maxilla family’s true intentions for the Brawler crew is soon
revealed in teeth and claws. Some will be hunted, some will be feed [sic], and some will become part of the family…whether they like it or not.” [via ShockTillYouDrop]
Sxv’Leithan Essex is allegedly a music video director, and at the very least, starred in the video for Five Finger Death Punch’s “The Bleeding.” Oh, and in case you were wondering whether he has a MySpace page, you better effing believe he has a MySpace page:
Oh hey, did I mention he was also an extra in the Brett Ratner masterpiece, X3?
Phil Baroni, MMA werewolves, Five Finger Death Punch, X3… IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER. I want to keep digging, but I’m worried that eventually I’ll get shipped off to an island of carnal pleasures where they’ll turn me into a donkey like Pinocchio.
Additional trivia: the pleasure island where they turn kids into donkeys in Pinocchio was called “The Land of Boobies” in the original Italian novel.








Benicio Del Toro calls Busshhhhhgggghhhtttt on this.
Seriously, I couldn’t understand a word he said.
But the Maxilla family’s true intentions for the Brawler crew is soon revealed in teeth and claws!
They release Firefox???
The blacks have some names to top that, they just don’t have internet in their villages yet. So, stalemate, I guess.
Any word on if he owns a dirtbike?
Hmmm…The Mighty Feklahr would guess either “Deep throating ice dongs” or “super retard
tater tot eating abilitystrength” for Sxv’Leithan Essex’s (double apostrophe!) mutant power.The Maxilla family has had the upper hand in their feud with the Mandibles for as long as anybody can remember.
OK, kids, KOOL KLINGON KONTEST TIME! The winner recieves an exclusive post on His blog! Qaplah! The contest?
How is “Sxv’Leithan” REALLY pronounced?
BTK, this island gets a bad rap; Pinnochio was just a pussy.
Fek: “Sexy Leviathan”
Sfifteen lee-tan
The first rule of werewolf fight club is: no silver jewelry.
Best part is that Danielle Harris is the angry girlfriend in the music video. I guess the original Halloween residuals weren’t enough to keep her happy.
First rule of werewolf fightclub:
Your hair is perfect.
I don’t think you’re supposed to pronounce Svx’le’s name out loud. It summons the kind of suck that can ruin an an afternoon of gas huffing in El Cajon.
I’m not Lycan this.
I’m actually a little disappointed that the guy didn’t find room in there some where for an umlaut.
Hmm. I figured the last sound you’d hear would be,
“Could you spare a spritz of Axe body spray?”
[door flies open]
You guys hear the Maxillia family is taking hand out… fuck.
hehe *splooge* heh
By the looks of this guy I’m not sure what his Essexual preference is.
It would seem there are no Polacks around here. Don’t you guys know that Sxv’Leithan is pronounced, Phill.
The name was a clerical error. The DGA clerck meant to type Nathan but sneezed and was to stoned to give a lick.
What??? No “mee-ux-pit-lick” guesses???????? BAH!
New up!
n’up
The first rule of Underground MMA Werewolf Fight Club is to not talk about Teen Wolf.
Just check this Sxv-whatever his name is video on MTV.com. He directed the one called ‘the way of the fist’ It’s pretty fuckin’ awesome. Maybe the tattooed freak will surprise us…
And where is there any mention of Phil Baroni being cast besides that the poster they found on a “myspace” page kind of looks like him. I believe supermarket tabloid bs sooner than that.